Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph illustrates how many shops that closed and opened in one country from 2011 to 2018.

Overall, over this years the busnise in this place climb, both the number of openings and closures shops dicrease.

First, between 2011 and 2018, the number of closed shops is stable between 6000 and 7000 shop, and the number of opened shops drop from around 9000 to 4000 in 2012 then increse to reach 6000 in 2013. Moreover, number of shop closures had a hard drop from 2013 to 2014 around 900 then increase and stable around 5000 shops.

In addition the number of opening

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You identify the chart’s subject and period, and you attempt an overview, but the main features are not reported accurately enough. The claim that closures stayed between 6,000 and 7,000 overlooks the sharp fall to about 600 in 2015; the later description of a drop “around 900” also gives the wrong period and figure. Openings fell from about 8,500 to 3,900 in 2012, but then rose only to around 5,000 in 2013, not 6,000. The overview that both series decreased is too broad to capture their fluctuations. The response is also below the required 150 words and ends mid-sentence, leaving the openings trend incomplete. Select the major peaks, troughs and overall contrast, and support them with accurate comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic structure: an introduction, an attempted overview and a paragraph beginning with “First,” followed by “Moreover” and “In addition.” These markers show an effort to organise the information. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the overview is unclear and the body shifts between closures and openings without a consistent comparison. The final phrase, “In addition the number of opening,” is unfinished, so the response has no complete ending and the last idea cannot be understood. Group the two series into a clear sequence—for example, give the overall picture first, then compare their main changes—and use linking phrases only where they clarify the relationship between points.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “number,” “drop,” “increase” and “stable,” so the reader can recognise the topic and intended trends. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, form and spelling problems make the account less clear: “busnise,” “dicrease” and “increse” are misspelled, while “the number of closed shops” and “the number of opened shops” are less natural than “shop closures” and “shop openings.” The phrase “had a hard drop” is also imprecise for describing data. Aim for accurate, conventional trend language and check spelling and word forms. More precise terms such as “fell sharply,” “recovered” and “fluctuated” would help describe the chart’s changes.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, including a sentence beginning “Moreover,” which shows some effort to connect information. However, grammatical control is uneven. In “over this years,” the demonstrative and plural noun do not agree; “the number of shop closures had a hard drop” has an awkward tense and structure; and “number of shop closures” needs an article or determiner. The opening sentence also uses the less suitable construction “how many shops that closed and opened.” The final fragment, “In addition the number of opening,” is incomplete. Practise accurate noun phrases and past-tense reporting, and make sure every sentence has a complete subject and verb. Use a few controlled complex sentences rather than extending sentences before their grammar is secure.

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