Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-07-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 6.0)

the given line graph illustrates the number of shops reflecting closed and opened number from 2011 to 2018 in our country.

to summarize,it can be clear from a cursory glance that both the closures and openings shops number are flactuated over the 8 years.newely opened shop ar much more than closures shop in 2011.over the 8 years both type of shops number are dramatically changed and closures shop are much more than openings shops.

to conclude, the shops which had opepnd in 2011 is nearly 8500 or some extra.but in 2012 the fresh openings shops number down rapidly and figure is approximate 4000.over the next certain years between 2013 and 2018 the newly opened shops number fluctuate consistently and in 2018 only 5000 shops open in that country.

one the other hand,the number of closures shops seems only 6500 in 2011.after that,the country faces up and down in the graph. but in 2015 the upward trend suddenly fall rapidly and the number went down only 500, then the next 3 years the closed number increased moderately.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the task by identifying the main trends, such as the initial higher number of openings and the subsequent shift where closures became more frequent. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. The overview is quite brief and lacks a clear synthesis of the data. While the response covers the period from 2011 to 2018, the reporting of figures is occasionally inaccurate (e.g., stating 500 closures in 2015, which does not align with typical graph interpretations). The response would benefit from more precise data selection and a more analytical approach to comparing the two categories throughout the period.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes misused, such as the transition 'to conclude' being used to introduce body paragraphs rather than a final summary. The progression of ideas is occasionally disjointed, and the referencing is sometimes unclear. The lack of sophisticated linking words makes the flow feel repetitive. Improving the use of transition signals and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would significantly enhance the coherence of the writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic terms like 'number', 'shops', and 'closed'. There are several spelling errors, such as 'newely', 'opepnd', and 'flactuated', which distract the reader. The range of vocabulary is sufficient to convey the basic meaning but lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. To improve, you should focus on using more varied synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' and ensure accurate spelling of key terms related to data description.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains frequent grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('closures shop are much more') and incorrect sentence structures. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and periods. While the writer attempts to use complex sentences, these are often faulty, leading to a lack of clarity. The majority of the sentences are simple, and the frequent errors in basic grammar and punctuation impede the overall flow and professional tone of the report.

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