Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 7.0)

The graph illustrates the number of closed and newly opened shops in a certain country from the year 2011 to 2018.

Overall, it can be seen that while the number of closed shops dropped suddenly in a certain year and rose again next year but otherwise almost steadily rose or lowered, the number of new shops dropped sharply in a certain year, rose again and then dropped gradually. It is evident that both the number of new and closed shops dropped sharply in 2015.

In 2015, the closed shop number became only about 700 to reach it lowest. However, the number of newly opened shops dropped sharply to 4000 in 2012 from the highest number, that is 8500, in 2011.

The number of closed shops in 2011 was about 6400 which dropped a little in 2012 and became 6000. After that, the number rose again to become about 7200 in 2013 and then again dropped to 6500 in 2014. After that, it faced its lowest peak in 2015 and then again rose sharply to 5200 in 2016. It remained almost steady through 2017 and 2018. On the other hand, The newly opened shop number dropped sharply in 2012 and then gradually rose to 5000 in 2013 and 6200 in 2014. After that, the new shop number lowered again in 2015 to become 4000 and remained steady in 2016. In 2017, the number rose only slightly to become 4100 but again lowered in 2018 to reach its lowest number of 3000.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided relevant data points to support your description. You covered both categories (closures and openings) across the entire period. However, the overview is somewhat vague, using phrases like 'in a certain year' rather than specifying the dates (e.g., 2015). To reach a higher band, ensure your overview highlights the most significant trends—such as the overall decline in new openings versus the fluctuations in closures—without relying on repetitive or imprecise language. You have clearly presented the key features, but the analysis could be more concise and focused on comparing the two trends more directly.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices like 'On the other hand' and 'After that' to link ideas. However, the progression of ideas is occasionally mechanical, and the use of 'After that' is repetitive. The referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and transition phrases to create a more natural, sophisticated structure. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the overview from the detailed data analysis.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You have an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuated', 'sharply', and 'gradually'. However, there is some repetition of basic verbs such as 'dropped' and 'rose'. To improve, try to incorporate more varied synonyms for change, such as 'plummeted', 'surged', 'declined', or 'remained stable'. There are also some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'lowest peak', which is a contradiction in terms. Expanding your range of descriptive adverbs and nouns related to data trends will help you achieve a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'the closed shop number became only about 700 to reach it lowest' (should be 'its lowest') and 'the newly opened shop number' (should be 'the number of newly opened shops'). Additionally, there are some minor issues with article usage and word order. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and consistent sentence structure will improve your accuracy.

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