Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-07-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given linear graph represent the data of numbers of shop closures and openings in single country. It is evident that the information showed in the given period of 2011 and 2018 respectively.
To commence with, it is noticeable that opening store was 6400 in the given graph between the years of 2011 and 2018. However, then grand opening of shops felt slightly down that was 6000. Meanwhile, again inauguration of store climbed 7200 furthermore, new launched store was dropped to 6600. Afterwards, there was suddenly depleted to less than 1000. After that, the number of business opening uplifted to grater digits that was 5200. Then, again slip back to 5000 and finally to 5200 of grand opening in given period of 2011 and 2018. Subsequently, the digits of business closure at starting was 8600 furthermore, then diminished to 3900. Post hoc, then moved and surged to 5000 and then more expanded to 6200 of shutdown shops. Correspondingly, their was suddenly dropped of permanent closure to 4000 and for next year it also remained constant. Eventually, then in 2017 their minor inclined to 4200. Lastly, in 2018 the number of closer stores plummet to 3000.
Overall, it is apparent that closer shops a
was highest and and opening stores was lowest in the years of 2011 and 2018
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response attempts to describe the data, but it fails to provide a clear overview or identify the main trends effectively. The description of the data points is often confusing and inaccurate, such as stating 'opening store was 6400' without specifying the year, or describing a drop to 'less than 1000' which does not align with the graph. The summary at the end is incomplete and grammatically broken. To improve, you must focus on grouping data logically (e.g., comparing the two categories over time) rather than listing every single point, and ensure your overview highlights the most significant trends, such as the overall decline in both closures and openings.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical flow is weak. While you use some cohesive devices like 'To commence with' and 'Overall', they are often used incorrectly or in a way that does not help the progression of ideas. The transition between sentences is frequently abrupt, and the lack of clear referencing makes it difficult for the reader to follow which year or category is being discussed. The final sentence is incomplete, which disrupts the coherence of the conclusion. Focus on using linking words to show relationships between data points rather than just listing them sequentially.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is quite limited and often repetitive. You frequently use incorrect word forms or collocations, such as 'grand opening of shops felt slightly down' (should be 'fell') and 'inauguration of store' (which is not appropriate for retail shops). Phrases like 'grater digits' and 'minor inclined' are inaccurate and hinder clarity. To reach a higher band, you need to use a wider range of vocabulary related to trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable') and ensure that your word choices are contextually appropriate for describing statistical data.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('opening store was', 'closer shops was'), incorrect verb tenses, and misuse of prepositions. Sentence structures are often simplistic or fragmented, and there are several instances of awkward phrasing that make the meaning unclear, such as 'Post hoc, then moved and surged'. Punctuation is also inconsistent. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like pluralization and verb forms. The use of complex structures is attempted but usually results in errors that impede communication.
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