Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates the cunt of businesses that shut down and those opened recently in a nation between two years, 2011 and 2018.

Overall, there are fluctuation in the number of shops openings and closing in all the years with a sharp decrease in the number os shop closed in the 2015.

Initially, there were more shops which are currently running than those closed in the year 2011, with about 8500 opened and 6500 closed. Over the next two years, opened business declined significantly decreased to 4000 before rising over the next two years reaching 6000 in the year 2014. The it dropped steadily to 4000 number in the next year and remained stable for the next two years and plummet to 3000, which was the lowest.

In 2012, a steady amount of shops decided to close with 6000, before increasing it to 7000 in the next year. It had a significant drop in the number over the next two years, reaching only 500 shops in the year 2015. It, then surged to about 5000 shops closed in 2016 before labelling off for the next two years.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, including the trends for both shop openings and closures. You successfully identified the starting points, the fluctuations, and the final figures. However, the analysis could be improved by making more direct comparisons between the two categories at specific points in time, rather than describing them in separate paragraphs. While the overview is present, it is slightly vague; mentioning specific years or the overall trend (e.g., the inverse relationship between the two lines in certain periods) would make it more analytical. Overall, the response addresses the requirements of the task well.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Initially', 'Over the next two years', and 'In 2012' to guide the reader through the timeline. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as 'The it dropped' (likely a typo for 'Then it dropped'). The paragraphing is appropriate, and there is a clear progression of information, though the flow between sentences could be smoother to achieve a higher band.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuation', 'plummet', 'surged', and 'steadily'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'cunt of businesses' (likely a typo for 'count'), 'labelling off' (should be 'leveling off'), and 'steady amount of shops' (where 'number' would be more precise). While these errors do not impede communication, they indicate a need for more precise control over collocations and spelling to reach a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'there are fluctuation' (subject-verb agreement), 'number os shop closed' (pluralization/preposition error), and 'opened business declined significantly decreased' (redundant verbs). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor slips throughout. While the meaning remains clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the response from reaching the 7.0 band, as the control over complex structures is not yet consistent.

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