Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph compares the number of shops that were newly opened to the ones that closed in the same county from 2011 to 2018.

Overall, the number of shop closures fluctuated considerably, reaching a dramatic low in 2015, before jumping back up. In contrast, the number of shops newly opened generally declined during the period.

In more details, shops shutdown rate keeps varying for four years then it sharply fell from an average of approximately 6700 shops to less than 700 in 2015, before recovering to 5000 closures In 2016 then nearly 5200 in 2018.

In the other hand, 8500 new shops were opened in the beginning of the period. The rate later decreased to less than 4000, however, it still went up briefly in 2014 by more than 6000, before falling lower for the rest of the period, with only 3000 stores launching.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the overall trends for both closures and openings. However, the response is under the 150-word minimum, which limits the depth of the analysis. While you have selected key data points, the description of the trends is sometimes imprecise, such as the phrase 'keeps varying for four years', which lacks clarity. To improve, ensure you provide a more detailed breakdown of the data points and ensure the response meets the length requirement to allow for a more comprehensive summary of the information provided in the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'In contrast', 'In more details', and 'In the other hand'. However, some of these are used incorrectly or awkwardly; for example, 'In the other hand' should be 'On the other hand', and 'In more details' should be 'In more detail'. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the mechanical nature of some transitions and minor errors in referencing affect the overall flow of the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You have used a range of vocabulary appropriate for describing trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'dramatic low', and 'sharply fell'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For instance, 'shops shutdown rate' is grammatically awkward, and 'launching' is not the most natural term for shops opening. Additionally, there are minor errors in phrasing that slightly hinder the precision of your report. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and ensuring that your vocabulary choices are consistently natural and accurate in an academic context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'the number of shops that were newly opened to the ones that closed' (which is slightly clunky) and 'shops shutdown rate keeps varying' (tense inconsistency). There are also punctuation and preposition errors, such as 'In more details' and 'In the other hand'. While these errors do not prevent communication, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall accuracy of the writing. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage will help improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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