Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The provided line graph depicts the number of shops that closed and the figures for newly commenced shops in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Overall, both the graphs were fluctuated between specified years, while the dotted line represented as an openings, initially, it was higher than closing shops. whereas, the closing shops ended up higher than commenced shops.
Initially, the opened shops were recorded, around 8,500. Furthermore, it decreased up to 4,000 shops, until 2012. Before getting a similar number in 2015, it stood for 6,000 shops, until 2014. After 2015, the chart remained constant until 2017. However, the figures plummeted from 2017 to 2018, over 3,000 shops.
On the other hand, the graph demonstrates the number of shops that were closed. In 2011, it was roughly 6,200. Followingly, it stood for 6,000 until 2012, by the year 2013, it rose and found that 7,000 shops faced a closures. A significant decline was experienced, around 500 shops were closed in 2015. By 2016, trend reversed and the figures took a remarkable incline, over 5,000 and it stood constant until the end.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, including the trends for both shop openings and closures. However, the analysis is somewhat inconsistent. For instance, the description of the data points is occasionally confusing, such as stating 'it stood for 6,000 shops, until 2014' and then mentioning a 'similar number in 2015'. The overview is present but lacks clarity, particularly in the phrasing 'both the graphs were fluctuated'. While the key trends are identified, the lack of precision in reporting specific data points and the slightly confusing summary of the overall trend limit the score to a 6.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs for each category. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Initially', 'Furthermore', and 'On the other hand', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly misused, such as 'Followingly' (which is not standard English) and the awkward phrasing in the overview. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the internal cohesion within the body paragraphs could be improved to better link the data points together.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, with attempts to use descriptive verbs like 'plummeted', 'fluctuated', and 'incline'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'newly commenced shops', 'faced a closures', and 'took a remarkable incline'. These errors occasionally distract the reader, though they do not impede overall communication. To reach a higher band, the student should focus on more natural collocations and avoid non-standard word forms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'both the graphs were fluctuated', 'represented as an openings', and 'it stood for 6,000 shops'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the response from reaching a higher band. The student should focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles to improve accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.