Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.5)

By analyzing the graph, we get to know that many ups and downs where there during 2011 to 2018 in the the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country. The doted line represents the number of shops opened and the straight lines represents the number of shops closed.

In the year 2011, the graph shows that around 6400 shops were closed and around 8500 shops were newely opened at that time. On the next year 2012, it has been showed that around 3900 or 4000 shops were been the shops that were open and around 6000 shops were closed. The next year in 2013, 5000 new shops were there that opened and around 7100 shops were closed. In 2014, there were almost similar number where around 6200 shops were opened as new and around 6500 shops were closed.

On the year 2015, it was the year where the least shops were closed, around 500 or 600 only, and on the other hand 4000 new shops were also opened. Till the year 2016, more 4000 new shops were opened and around 5200 shops were closed too. And on the year 2017, there were similar results as the year 2016 which was 4200 shops were newely opened and 5000 shops were closed. In the final year 2018, 3000 shops were opened as new and around 5200 shops were closed

By this way, there was a many ups and downs in the pitch of graph shown as the shops were closing and opening in a huge amount during 2011 to 2018.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, including the trends for both shop openings and closures. However, the analysis is largely a list of data points rather than a synthesis of the information. While you identify the key trends, the 'overview' is weak; it describes the graph's appearance rather than highlighting the most significant trends, such as the overall decline in openings or the specific period where closures peaked. To improve, focus on grouping data to show trends rather than listing every year individually, and ensure the overview clearly summarizes the main movements over the entire period.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the chronological structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'In the year 2011', 'On the next year 2012', 'The next year in 2013'). The progression of ideas is clear, but the transitions between sentences could be more varied to improve the flow. Additionally, the final paragraph is quite brief and does not effectively synthesize the information provided in the body paragraphs. Using a wider range of linking words and phrases would help create a more natural and sophisticated flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and variety expected at higher bands. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'many ups and downs' and 'newly opened'. There are also some errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'newely' and 'pitch of graph'. To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more academic vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'declined', or 'remained stable'. Avoiding repetitive structures and using more precise terminology will significantly enhance the quality of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'many ups and downs where there during 2011', 'around 3900 or 4000 shops were been the shops', and 'there was a many ups and downs'. These errors involve subject-verb agreement, tense usage, and awkward phrasing. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would be very beneficial.

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