Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-20
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line chart illustrates that the average number of new shops are opened and closed in one nation from 2011 to 2018.
Overall, in the starting of year new stores shows upward trend numbers. However, it shows downward trend for closing the shops. Meanwhile, the period it depicts the various fluctuations.
In the begining of 2011, the new shops significantly reach there peak under 9,000 shops. Furthermore, in 2012 it demonstrates a drastic declined to bottom out just under 4,000. therefore, it rapidly increased in 2014 just above 6,000. Therefore, between 2014 and 2017 shows fluctuation in this year and in 2018 new stores opened reach approximately 3,000.
In contrast, from the starting year closures are lesser then openings above 6,000 shops, In over the years shows palputations until 2014, consequently in 2015 less then 1,000 shops are start closing. In addition from 2016 to 2018 closing shops rate are higher than opening and stedly change through three year and reach more than 5,000.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, including the trends for both shop openings and closures. However, the analysis is somewhat inconsistent. While you identify the peak and the fluctuations, the description of the data is occasionally inaccurate (e.g., stating closures were 'lesser then openings' at the start, which contradicts the visual data). The overview is present but lacks clarity, and some data points are described vaguely. To improve, ensure you accurately interpret the values on the axes and provide a more precise summary of the overall trends without relying on repetitive phrasing.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or incorrect. For example, the repeated use of 'Therefore' to start sentences is inappropriate, as it does not logically follow the preceding statement. Additionally, referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult to track which trend is being discussed. The progression of ideas is hindered by these awkward transitions and the lack of variety in linking words. Improving the range and accuracy of your cohesive devices will significantly enhance the flow of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. You rely on basic terms like 'upward trend' and 'downward trend' repeatedly. There are also several instances of word-choice errors and non-standard phrasing, such as 'palputations' (likely meant 'fluctuations') and 'stedly change'. Some collocations are unnatural, such as 'new shops significantly reach there peak'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise vocabulary to describe data trends, such as 'surged', 'plummeted', or 'remained stable', and ensure you check your spelling and word forms carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'new stores shows'), incorrect verb tenses, and misuse of prepositions. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with run-on sentences and incorrect comma usage throughout the text. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on sentence construction and proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement will help improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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