Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The rendered pictorial outlies elucidate the changes in number of new shops open and close in the country from 2011 to 2018.

Overall,this can be explicitly seen in both follow the downward trend with fluctuations . Closure figures declined substantially, however open shops showed plunged marginally.

Zooming into the details, initially closure shop data higher than 8000 which fall down drastically to 4000 and upsured steadily to 6000 . In 2014 , figures slipped back and levelled off for next two years . In 2017 , plunged by 1000.

Leaping further on new shops , in 2011 numbers which were more than 6000, decreased slightly and then rose by 1000 . In 2013 figures plunged considerably and rebounded at 5000 and after two years regain the same position which is more than 5000

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you have identified the main trends, the analysis is somewhat superficial and lacks the necessary detail to fully support the overview. For instance, you mention 'fluctuations' but do not provide enough specific data points to illustrate these effectively. The overview is present but could be more clearly articulated. To improve, ensure you provide a more comprehensive summary of the data, including more specific figures and comparisons between the two categories, while ensuring the response meets the length requirement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes disjointed, and the use of cohesive devices is limited and occasionally mechanical (e.g., 'Zooming into the details', 'Leaping further on'). The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of information. To improve, use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs more naturally, and ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus that contributes to the overall logical development of the report.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is somewhat repetitive and occasionally inaccurate. Phrases like 'rendered pictorial outlies' and 'upsured' are either unnatural or non-existent in this context. While you attempt to use some descriptive verbs like 'plunged' and 'rebounded', the overall range is limited. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'closure shop data'. To improve, focus on using more precise vocabulary for describing trends, such as 'decreased', 'fluctuated', or 'remained stable', and ensure that you use these terms in their correct grammatical context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with article usage (e.g., 'in the country'), verb tense consistency, and sentence structure (e.g., 'closure figures declined substantially, however open shops showed plunged marginally'). The range of structures is limited, and the errors in basic grammar are noticeable. To improve, focus on mastering simple sentence structures before attempting more complex ones. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement and the correct use of prepositions and articles, as these are recurring issues throughout your writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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