Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph illustrates the number of shops that shut down and the number shops that inagurated in one particular region from 2011 to 2018.
Overall it is clear that, Shops closures and oepnings a were dropped sharply over ther years. Where at one point clousure rate fall under 1000 in 2015 while openings experienced moderate fluctuation after 2012.
Looking at the details, Openings stood 8500 in 2011 before falling sharply to 3000 in 2018. In 2012 openings dipped to 4000 after that it had peaked up to 6200 in 2014. But it dipped again to 4000 at 2015 by maintaining moderate fluctation and reached 3000 in 2018.
Turning at remain figures, number of shop closures experienced slight fluctuations before dropped sharply to 700 in 2015. After that it started rose up and maintian a similar pattern with shop openings and crossed 5000 by the year 2018.
By contrast, it is noticable that the tendency of closing shops were increased among the people in 2018 where in 2011 total shop opening number was higher .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, including the trends for both shop closures and openings. However, the analysis is somewhat inconsistent. For instance, the statement that 'closure rate fall under 1000 in 2015' is accurate, but the description of the trends is occasionally confusing, such as the claim that closures 'maintian a similar pattern with shop openings' toward the end, which is not clearly supported by the data. While the key features are identified, the lack of precision in describing the data points and the slightly inaccurate summary of the overall trend limit the score. To improve, ensure that comparisons are more precise and that the overview accurately reflects the general trends shown in the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'Turning at remain figures' and 'By contrast, it is noticable' are awkward and do not effectively link ideas. Additionally, the progression of ideas within paragraphs is sometimes disjointed, making it difficult to follow the logic. The referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as the use of 'it' without a clear antecedent. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each sentence flows logically from the previous one.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary range is limited and contains several errors in word choice and spelling. Examples include 'inagurated' (instead of 'opened'), 'oepnings', 'clousure', and 'maintian'. These errors, while not always impeding communication, are frequent enough to distract the reader. The student relies on basic vocabulary and struggles with collocations, such as 'peaked up to' and 'tendency of closing shops'. To achieve a higher band, the student should focus on using more precise terminology for describing trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'declined', 'surged') and pay closer attention to spelling and standard word forms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response uses a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('Shops closures and oepnings a were dropped'), incorrect verb tenses ('it had peaked up'), and missing articles or prepositions ('number shops', 'at 2015'). These errors are persistent and occasionally make the meaning unclear. While the student attempts to use complex structures, the lack of accuracy in these attempts prevents a higher score. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like subject-verb agreement would significantly improve the quality of the writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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