Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph illustrates the amount of shops that closed and the amount of new shops that opened in one country in thousands between 2011 and 2018.
Overall, both closed and new shops that were opened in this country experience a non-stop fall in these years. But the number of closed shops were decrease more than the number of new opened shops.
In 2011, the numbers of closed shops significantly went down to 4000 and the numbers of new shops also declined slightly to 6000 from 6200.
In 2012 and 2013 the numbers of closed shops gradually climbed to 6100 and the numbers of new shops stepped up to 6200. In 2014 the numbers of new shops dropped very quickly to 700 which were lowest number in these years. The numbers of closed shops come down to 4000 in this period.
In 2015, the numbers of new shops rapidly climbed to 5100 and the numbers of closed shops stayed at for this period. After that the numbers of both shops remain at same level till 2018 just the numbers of closed shops slightly fell in final year.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, but the analysis is significantly undermined by inaccurate reporting of the data. For instance, you state that the number of closed shops 'significantly went down to 4000' in 2011, which is not supported by the visual data. Furthermore, the description of trends is often contradictory or confusing, such as claiming a 'non-stop fall' while simultaneously describing periods where numbers 'climbed' or 'stepped up'. To improve, ensure you carefully cross-reference the years and figures on the axes to avoid factual errors, and focus on identifying the most significant trends rather than listing every year.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the logical progression is frequently interrupted by inaccurate data reporting and confusing transitions. While you use some cohesive devices like 'In 2011' and 'After that', the connections between sentences are sometimes mechanical or illogical. For example, the transition 'But the number of closed shops were decrease more than...' is grammatically awkward and fails to clearly link the ideas. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider range of cohesive devices to show the relationship between the data points more clearly.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for a higher band. You rely on basic verbs like 'went down', 'climbed', and 'stepped up' to describe trends. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'amount of shops' (use 'number of shops' for countable nouns) and 'new opened shops' (redundant). To improve, incorporate more sophisticated reporting verbs and nouns, such as 'fluctuated', 'plummeted', or 'a downward trend', and ensure you use countable/uncountable nouns correctly.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There is a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but the response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('the numbers of closed shops were decrease') and tense inconsistencies ('the numbers of closed shops come down'). Additionally, there are errors with articles and prepositions, such as 'stayed at for this period'. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors prevents the response from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring consistent verb tenses when describing past data.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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