Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the information about the count of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in a nation from 2011 to 2018.

Firstly, in 2011 the count of new shops was maximum which was nearly 8500, while the number of closed shops was below 7000. The number of new shops decreased drastically and reached at 4000, in 2012. The count of closed shops and new opened shops was approximatley similar which was around 6300, in 2014.

In 2015, the count of new opened shops declined sharply and accounted at below 1000. From 2016 to 2018, the number of new shops remain stable at nearly 5000. The count of closed shops was nearly 4000 between 2015 and 2017 and it decreased by 1000 in 2018.

Overall, fluctuations were noticed between new opened shops and closed shops. The count of new shops was at peak in the initial year and least in 2015.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers the main features of the graph, including the starting points, the significant decline in 2015, and the trends toward the end of the period. However, the analysis is somewhat mechanical and lacks a clear overview of the most striking trends. While the key data points are identified, the comparison between the two categories could be more analytical. For instance, noting that closures consistently remained lower than openings until the 2015 crossover would have strengthened the response. The summary is present but could be more integrated into the body paragraphs to provide a more cohesive narrative of the data.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a brief summary. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly' and 'In 2015', but the transitions between sentences can feel a bit repetitive and mechanical. The referencing is generally clear, though the flow between the description of the two lines could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate for the task, helping to separate the different time periods effectively. Overall, the information is presented in a way that is easy to follow, though the use of linking words could be more varied to improve the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to describe trends such as 'decreased drastically', 'declined sharply', and 'remain stable'. However, there is a lack of variety in the reporting verbs and nouns used. Phrases like 'the count of' are repeated frequently, which limits the lexical range. There are also some minor inaccuracies in collocation, such as 'accounted at below 1000' (should be 'accounted for' or 'stood at'). To reach a higher band, the student should incorporate more precise vocabulary related to data trends, such as 'plummeted', 'fluctuated', or 'a marginal decrease'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'new opened shops' (should be 'newly opened' or just 'new shops') and 'reached at 4000' (should be 'reached 4000'). Punctuation is generally acceptable, though there are some unnecessary commas, such as '4000, in 2012'. The control of grammar is sufficient to communicate the information, but the frequency of these minor errors prevents the response from reaching a higher band. More attention to preposition usage and adjective-adverb placement would be beneficial.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.