Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-30
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the number of openings and closures of new shops in a particular nation from 2011 to 2018.
Overall, closure fluctuated in between 2011 and 2018 from 6500 closed shops to around 5000 expect the year of 2015. In contrast, openings of new shops began a start with huge numbers of 8500 but then fluctuated in between 6000 to 3000.
In 2011, 6500 shops closed. The number of closure fluctuated over next four years but in dramatically fall in 2015 to roughly 700 shops. The following year closure of shops sharply rose. The next few years the closure remaind steady at approximately around 5000 shops.
The number of openings were at high position throughout the years. However it dramatically fall the next year before receeding it bounce back to 50% of the Top rank. In 2015 the number of openings fell back at the level of 2012. For the further years it leveled off and fell again in 2018.
The openings of the new shops gradually fell all those years expect 2013 and 2014.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the trends for both shop openings and closures. However, the analysis is somewhat inconsistent. While you correctly identify the 2015 dip in closures, the description of the openings is confusing and lacks precision. Phrases like '50% of the Top rank' are vague and do not accurately reflect the data provided in the graph. To improve, ensure that all comparisons are clearly supported by the figures and avoid ambiguous descriptions that do not clearly convey the data to the reader.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the logical progression within the paragraphs is often hindered by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing. For example, the transition 'before receeding it bounce back' is confusing and lacks a clear cohesive link to the previous clause. While you use some cohesive devices, they are often used mechanically or incorrectly, which disrupts the flow of information. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is limited and sometimes inaccurate. You rely on basic terms like 'huge numbers' and 'high position', which lack the precision required for an Academic Task 1 report. There are also several word-choice errors, such as 'receeding' (likely meant 'receding') and 'expect' instead of 'except'. To achieve a higher band, you should focus on using more precise vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'plummeted', 'stabilised', or 'fluctuated', and ensure that your spelling is accurate throughout the response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'closure fluctuated', 'number of openings were'), incorrect verb forms ('remaind'), and awkward sentence construction ('in dramatically fall'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly regarding the use of commas. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence patterns and proofreading for common errors like tense consistency and pluralisation, which will help make your writing more accurate and professional.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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