Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Writing Task 1

The line graph tracks the information about how many new shops are opened and closed in one country from 2011 to 2018.

In the first step there is a line graph between x and y axis. On x-axis there is a number of shops. On y-axis number of year is listed. The dash line shows the new shop is opened and the doted line shows the number of shops of closed. In 2011 there are 6500 new shops are opened but on the other side there are 8500 shops are closed. Number of closed shops is comparatively higher than the new openings.

In addition In [redacted phone] new shops are opened but 4000 shops are closed that shows the good margin new shops are opening are higher than the closed ones. All the graph shows that kind of work. At last in 2018 The new shops are opened is 5500 and closed shops are 3000 that is good for the country economy.

In conclusion the graphs shows the relationship between opened and closed shops from 2011 to 2018. If a country has high number of new shops the economy is good if country had high number of closed shops the economy will affected.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to address the task but fails to provide a clear overview of the main trends. The description of the graph is inaccurate, as you describe the axes incorrectly (the x-axis represents years, not the number of shops). Furthermore, the analysis is superficial and relies on personal interpretation regarding the country's economy rather than focusing on the data provided. To improve, you must identify the key features, such as the overall decline in closures or the point where the two lines intersect, and avoid adding external opinions that are not supported by the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical flow is weak. The introduction is confusing due to the misidentification of the axes. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'In addition' and 'In conclusion', but they are often used mechanically or inappropriately. The progression of ideas is hindered by the lack of clear comparisons between the two lines. To reach a higher band, ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus and use linking words to connect data points logically rather than just listing them year by year.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. You frequently use basic phrases like 'new shops are opened' and 'shops are closed'. There is little attempt to use academic vocabulary or synonyms to describe trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable'). Additionally, there are errors in word choice, such as 'good margin' and 'that kind of work', which do not fit the context of a formal report. Expanding your range of descriptive verbs and nouns related to data analysis is essential for improvement.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'the graphs shows', 'number of year is listed') and incorrect passive voice construction (e.g., 'new shops are opened' instead of 'new shops opened'). The sentence structures are mostly simple, with limited attempts at complex sentences. To improve, focus on mastering basic tense consistency and ensuring that your sentence structures are grammatically sound before attempting more complex forms.

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