Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The number of shops that closed and the number of new shops opened in one country between 2011 and 2018 was revealed by this graph in thousands.
Overall, new shops show highest negative movement in 2015 and they are on lowest point in this year during the period. Both new and closed shops experienced negative and positive movement between these years.
In starting period new shops were 6400 and closed shops were 8500. In 2012, new shops slightly fall to 6000 while closed shops went down sharply to 3950. In 2013 and 2014, closed shops significantly expanded to 6200 in contrast new shops experienced a fall to 6600 in 2014 after a positive movement in 2013.
In 2015, new shops rapidly dropped to just 700 and that is the lowest number in this graph in comparison close shops also declined to 4000.
In 2016, new shops stepped up quickly to 5100 while close shops stayed at.
In 2017 both shows very small movements but in the last year the number of closed shop rapidly dropped to 3000.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, such as the initial figures and the significant drop in 2015. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. The overview is weak, as it describes the trends as 'negative' or 'positive' rather than identifying the key overall patterns, such as the general volatility of new shop openings compared to the more gradual decline in closures. Some data points are described, but the comparison between the two categories is not consistently developed throughout the report. To improve, ensure the overview highlights the most significant trends rather than just listing movements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the chronological progression. However, the use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes mechanical. Phrases like 'In starting period' and 'In 2016' are used to transition, but there is a lack of sophisticated linking words to connect ideas within sentences. Additionally, some sentences are fragmented or lack clear logical flow, such as the incomplete sentence 'while close shops stayed at.' Improving the variety of linking expressions and ensuring every sentence is complete would significantly enhance the coherence of the report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for a higher band. There is a reliance on basic verbs like 'fall', 'dropped', and 'stepped up'. Some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'negative movement' to describe a decrease in numbers. There are also minor errors in word form, such as 'close shops' instead of 'closed shops'. To achieve a higher score, you should incorporate more precise academic vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'plummeted', or 'remained stable'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response uses a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'the number of shops... was revealed' (subject-verb agreement), 'in contrast new shops experienced' (missing punctuation), and 'both shows' (subject-verb agreement). The sentence 'while close shops stayed at' is incomplete and grammatically incorrect. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the response from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and ensuring all sentences have a clear subject and predicate is essential.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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