Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph provides the comparison trend between two aspects in a country from 2011 to 2018: the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened.

Overall, at the start of the period, more shops were opened as compared to the closing of shops. During the whole period, a lot of fluctuations occurred from time to time, and both categories overlapped the other, but at the end, the opening of shops led to a huge margin.

In 2011, opening of shops accounted for about 8500, while closure was approximately 6500. After one year, closed shops showed a slight decrease and were a share of 6000 but surpassed the opening category, while the opening of shops class showed a significant decline from 6000 in 2011 to 4000 in 2012. In 2013, the opening and closing of the shops moved in an upward trend, accounting for 7100 and 5000, respectively. Although the opening of shops followed the significant increment and climbed to 6100, the closure of shops had a downward trend with a share of around 6200.

In 2015, the closure of shops showed a sharp decline from around 6100 to around 1000. Closure of shops had a slight decline and moved to 4000 in 2015. In 2016 and 2017, the opening of shops category had plateaued growth, while closure surpassed the opening class in 2016 and moved to around 5000. In 2016 and 2017, closure had slight fluctuations and had about 5000 at the end of the period, while openings had a minute decline in 2018 and stayed at 3000.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided a clear overview. However, there are significant inaccuracies in your data reporting. For instance, you state that in 2012, closures 'surpassed' openings, but the graph shows openings at 4000 and closures at 6000, which is correct, yet your description of the 2015 data is contradictory, mentioning a 'sharp decline' to 1000 followed immediately by a claim that it moved to 4000. These inconsistencies make the report unreliable. To reach a higher band, ensure that your data points are transcribed accurately from the graph and that your comparisons are logically consistent throughout the response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is logically organized into paragraphs, with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'In 2011', 'After one year', and 'In 2016 and 2017', which help guide the reader. However, the progression within the body paragraphs is sometimes confusing due to the factual errors mentioned earlier. The use of referencing is generally clear, but the flow is occasionally disrupted by the contradictory statements regarding the data. Improving the logical flow between sentences and ensuring that cohesive devices are used to link accurate information will improve this score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuations', 'plateaued', and 'accounted for'. However, there are some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'opening of shops class' and 'a share of 6000', which sound unnatural. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. To improve, focus on using more academic collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing when describing trends.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'Although the opening of shops followed the significant increment...'. While many sentences are clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'both categories overlapped the other' (should be 'each other') and 'opening of shops class showed a significant decline' (missing articles). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but the frequency of these minor grammatical slips prevents the response from reaching a higher band. Focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles to enhance accuracy.

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