Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph provides the comparative trend between two aspects in a country from 2011 to 2018: the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened.

Overall, at the start of the period, more shops were opened as compared to the closing of shops. During the whole period, numerous fluctuations occurred from time to time, and both categories overlapped each other.

In 2011, the opening of shops accounted for about 8500, while closure was approximately 6500. After one year, closed shops showed a slight decrease and moved to 6000 but surpassed the opening category, while the opening of shops class showed a significant decline from 6000 in 2011 to 4000 in 2012. In 2013, the opening and closing of the shops accounted for 5000 and 7100, respectively. Although the opening of shops followed the significant increment and climbed to 6100, the closure of shops had a downward trend with around 6200.

In 2015, the closure of shops showed a sharp decline from around 6100 to around 600. Closure of shops had a slight decline and moved to 4000 in 2015. In 2016 and 2017, the opening of shops category had remained stable, while closure surpassed the opening class in 2016 and moved to around 5000. In 2016 and 2017, closure had slight fluctuations and had about 5000 at the end of the period, while openings had a slight decline in 2018 and stayed at 3000.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all parts of the task and provides a clear overview of the trends. You successfully identified the main features, such as the initial higher number of openings and the subsequent fluctuations. However, there are some inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, you mention a decline to 'around 600' in 2015, which is not supported by the graph. Additionally, some descriptions of the trends are slightly confusing, such as stating that closures 'surpassed the opening category' in 2012 when the graph shows openings were lower. To improve, ensure you carefully cross-reference your figures with the graph and provide more precise comparisons between the two categories throughout the period.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is logically organized into paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use cohesive devices such as 'In 2011', 'After one year', and 'In 2015' to guide the reader through the timeline. However, the progression within the third paragraph is slightly disjointed, particularly when discussing the 2015 data. The transition between the years is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing of 'the opening of shops class' is slightly awkward. Improving the flow between sentences and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear thematic focus would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuations', 'accounted for', 'surpassed', and 'downward trend'. There are some instances of repetitive phrasing, such as 'opening of shops' and 'closure of shops', which could be varied. Additionally, some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'opening of shops class'. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise synonyms and collocations related to data description, such as 'a marginal decrease' or 'a significant surge', while ensuring that your terminology remains accurate to the context of the graph.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. While many sentences are clear, there are some grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow, such as 'the opening of shops class showed a significant decline' and 'the opening of shops category had remained stable'. There are also some issues with tense consistency and article usage. To improve, focus on ensuring subject-verb agreement and refining your use of articles and prepositions. Increasing the variety of your complex sentence structures while maintaining accuracy will help you achieve a higher score in this criterion.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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