Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph provides the comparative trend between two aspects in a country from 2011 to 2018: the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened.

Overall, at the start of the period, more shops were opened as compared to the closing of shops. During the whole period, numerous fluctuations occurred from time to time, and both categories overlapped each other.

In 2011, the opening of shops accounted for about 8500, while closure was approximately 6500. After one year, closed shops showed a slight decrease and moved to 6000 but surpassed the opening category, while the opening of shops class showed a significant decline from 6000 in 2011 to 4000 in 2012. In 2013, the opening and closing of the shops accounted for 5000 and 7100, respectively. Although the opening of shops followed the increase and climbed to 6100, the closure of shops had a downward trend with around 6200.

In 2015, the closure of shops showed a sharp decline from around 6100 to around 600. Closure of shops had a slight decline and moved to 4000 in 2015. In 2016 and 2017, the opening of shops category had remained stable, while closure surpassed the opening class in 2016 and moved to around 5000. In 2016 and 2017, closure had slight fluctuations and had about 5000 at the end of the period, while openings had a slight decline in 2018 and stayed at 3000.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph and makes relevant comparisons. You successfully identified the starting points and the general trends. However, there are significant inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, you mention a decline to '600' in 2015, which is not supported by the graph, and your description of the 2012 data is confusing and contradictory regarding which category was higher. To improve, ensure that your data points are precise and that your comparisons clearly distinguish between the two categories. The overview is present but could be more analytical by highlighting the most significant trend, such as the overall decline in both openings and closures by the end of the period.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices like 'In 2011', 'After one year', and 'In 2015' to guide the reader through the timeline. However, the progression within the third paragraph is somewhat mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly when discussing the 'opening of shops class'. The transition between the 2016 and 2017 data is also slightly repetitive. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensuring that the logical flow between sentences is smoother and less reliant on simple time markers.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuations', 'surpassed', and 'downward trend'. However, there is some awkward phrasing, such as 'opening of shops class' and 'the opening of shops followed the increase'. Some word choices are imprecise, and there is a tendency to repeat the same phrases ('opening of shops', 'closure of shops') throughout the text. To improve, try to use synonyms or refer to the categories more concisely (e.g., 'the former' or 'the latter') to avoid repetitive language and demonstrate a more sophisticated control of vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'the opening of shops accounted for about 8500' (should be 'the number of new shops opened was about 8,500') and 'the opening of shops category had remained stable' (tense usage is slightly off). While these errors do not generally impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and ensuring that your sentence structures are grammatically sound, particularly when describing numerical data.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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