Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-04
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph provides the comparative trend between two aspects in a country from 2011 to 2018: the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened.
Overall, at the start of the period, more shops were opened as compared to the closing of shops. During the whole period, numerous fluctuations occurred from time to time, and both categories overlapped each other.
In 2011, the opening of shops accounted for about 8500, while closure was approximately 6500. Additionally, after one year, closed shops showed a slight decrease and moved to 6000 but surpassed the opening category, while the opening of shops class showed a significant decline from 6000 in 2011 to 4000 in 2012. In addition, the opening and closing of the shops accounted for 5000 and 7100, respectively, in 2013. Moreover, the former followed the increase and climbed to 6100; the latter had a downward trend with around 6200.
In 2015, the closure of shops showed a sharp decline from around 6100 to around 600. Furthermore, closure of shops had a slight decline and moved to 4000 in 2015. In 2016 and 2017, the launching of shops category remained stable, while ceasement surpassed the former class in 2016 and moved to around 5000. In 2016 and 2017, the closure had slight fluctuations and had about 5000 at the end of the period, while openings had a slight decline in 2018 and stayed at 3000.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
You have successfully identified the main trends and provided relevant data points to support your description. However, the report contains several factual inaccuracies regarding the data. For example, you state that in 2015, closures dropped to 600, which is not supported by the graph, and your description of the 2012 figures is confusing and contradictory. While you cover the period from 2011 to 2018, the lack of precision in reporting the figures significantly impacts the accuracy of your summary. To improve, ensure that your data extraction is precise and that your comparisons are clearly linked to the specific years shown on the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'In addition', 'Moreover', and 'Furthermore'. However, the flow of information is sometimes hindered by awkward phrasing and confusing transitions. For instance, the transition between the 2015 data and the subsequent years is disjointed. While the overall progression is generally logical, the mechanical use of some linking words and the occasional lack of clarity in referencing (e.g., 'the former', 'the latter') make the text feel slightly disjointed in places.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuations', 'surpassed', and 'downward trend'. However, there are some instances of imprecise or unnatural word choices, such as 'opening of shops class' and 'ceasement'. Additionally, some phrasing is repetitive. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations related to data description and avoid inventing terms that are not standard in academic English.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with article usage ('the opening of shops class') and prepositional phrases. Some sentences are also structurally awkward, such as 'the opening and closing of the shops accounted for 5000 and 7100, respectively, in 2013'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to lower the overall accuracy score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage would be beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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