Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph provides the comparative trend between two aspects in a country from 2011 to 2018: the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened.

Overall, at the start of the period, more shops were opened as compared to the closing of shops. During the whole period, numerous fluctuations occurred from time to time, and both categories overlapped each other.

In 2011, the opening of shops accounted for about 8500, while closure was approximately 6500. Additionally, after one year, closed shops showed a slight decrease and moved to 6000 but surpassed the opening category, while the opening of shops class showed a significant decline from 6000 in 2011 to 4000 in 2012. In addition, the opening and closing of the shops accounted for 5000 and 7100, respectively, in 2013. Moreover, the former followed the increase and climbed to 6100; the latter had a downward trend with around 6200 in 2014.

In contrast, the closure of shops showed a sharp decline from around 6200 in 2014 to around 600 in 2015. Furthermore, the opening of shops had a slight decline and moved to 4000 in 2015. In 2016 and 2017, the new shops category remained stable, while closing surpassed the former class in 2016 and moved to around 5000. In 2017, the closure had slight fluctuations to stay about 5000 at the end of the period, while openings had a slight decline in 2018 and remained at 3000.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided a clear overview. You selected key data points to support your descriptions, such as the figures for 2011 and 2015. However, there are some inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, you stated that in 2012, the opening of shops was 4000, but the graph shows it was closer to 5000. Additionally, the description of the 2015 closure figure as 'around 600' is a significant misreading of the graph, which shows a figure closer to 3000. To reach a higher band, ensure that data points are read with greater precision and that comparisons between the two categories are more consistently highlighted throughout the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The response is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs that follow a chronological sequence. You use a range of cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'Furthermore', and 'Moreover' to link your ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as when you refer to 'the former' and 'the latter' in a way that makes the sentence structure slightly cumbersome. Paragraphing is used effectively to separate the different time periods, which helps the reader follow the progression of the data.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuations', 'accounted for', and 'surpassed'. There are some instances of slightly unnatural phrasing, such as 'opening of shops class' or 'the former followed the increase'. While these do not impede communication, they limit the precision of your writing. To improve, focus on using more natural collocations related to data description, such as 'a downward trend' or 'remained stable'. Your spelling is accurate throughout the response.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. There are some grammatical errors, such as 'the opening of shops class showed a significant decline' and 'the closure had slight fluctuations to stay about 5000'. These errors do not generally cause confusion for the reader. You have good control over basic punctuation and sentence construction. To move to a higher band, try to incorporate a wider variety of complex structures, such as using participle clauses or more sophisticated passive constructions to describe the data trends.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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