Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 4.0)

the given graph shows that the number of shops closures and openings [redacted phone]. firstly we can see the shops closure rate was going down & the openings rate going higher. but in the mid of [redacted phone] the openings of shops rate was lowest & the shops closure rate was also going down that time. but in the last time period of [redacted phone] the shop opening rate was rise & the closure rate was a little bit down. That's all the information that the given graph shows. from the given graph chart we get a clear answer about the rate of shops openings & closure in the time of [redacted phone]. By reading this graph summary anyone can get clear knowledge of the graph chart more easily. So i think if anyone interested about it then they can read this summary to know, its easier than analysis t

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which negatively impacts the score. Furthermore, the content is significantly underdeveloped. You have not provided specific data points or trends from the graph, such as the starting or ending figures, which are essential for a Task 1 response. The summary is overly vague, using phrases like 'in the mid of' and 'last time period' rather than identifying specific years. To improve, you must report key features and use data to support your descriptions. The response also includes irrelevant commentary about the graph's utility rather than focusing solely on the data provided.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The response lacks a clear structure. There is no introduction, body paragraphing, or logical progression of ideas. The use of cohesive devices is very limited and often repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'but' to start sentences. The text feels like a stream of consciousness rather than a formal report. To improve, you should organize your writing into clear paragraphs: an introduction, an overview of the main trends, and specific details. Use a wider range of linking words like 'in contrast,' 'subsequently,' or 'meanwhile' to connect your ideas more effectively.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary is very basic and repetitive. You frequently use the same terms, such as 'rate' and 'graph,' without demonstrating a range of synonyms or more precise academic language. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'openings of shops rate was lowest' and 'the shop opening rate was rise.' To reach a higher band, you need to use more varied and precise vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated,' 'declined,' 'surpassed,' or 'remained stable,' and ensure that your word forms are grammatically correct.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with sentence structure, such as the lack of a main verb in the opening sentence ('the given graph shows that the number of shops closures...'). You also struggle with articles ('the shops closure rate') and verb tenses ('the shop opening rate was rise'). The writing relies on simple sentence structures and lacks the complex grammatical forms required for higher bands. Focus on subject-verb agreement, correct article usage, and ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and predicate.

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