Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 5.0)
This graphs demonstrate the list of opening and closing number of shops between 2011 to 2018 of a country.
Firstly we see the graphs is showing a random frequency for both closures and openings number of shops.Starting with 2011, the number of closures shop was in its peak point whereas the number of openings shop was around 6400.Additionally, the highest number of openings shop had taken place in 2013 when the number of closures shop was exact 5000.In 2012, the number of closures shop took the least place.On the contrast, the least number of openigs shop was in 2015.Again, in 2014, the number of closures and openings shop was almost similar obtaining series of around 6200 and 6500.Moreover, the tendency of closing shops remain parallel from 2015 to 2016, as the number remains unchangeable.In 2017, the number of closures shop increased very slightly.Even from 2016 to 2018, the changing trend of opening shops also demonstrate very shortly.
Hence, the changing trend of closures and openings shop illustrated non-frequently in this graph.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, such as the peak in closures in 2011 and the peak in openings in 2013. However, the analysis is somewhat mechanical and lacks a clear overview or summary of the overall trends. The student identifies specific data points but struggles to synthesize the information effectively to highlight the broader relationship between closures and openings. Some data points are described with imprecise language, such as 'random frequency', which does not accurately reflect the data. To reach a higher band, the student should focus on grouping data logically and providing a clear, concise summary of the main trends at the beginning of the report.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is organized into paragraphs, but the logical flow is hindered by repetitive sentence structures and awkward transitions. While cohesive devices like 'Firstly', 'Additionally', and 'Moreover' are used, they are often applied mechanically rather than to create a smooth progression of ideas. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the paragraphing is not fully utilized to separate distinct trends. The conclusion is brief and does not effectively summarize the main findings, instead repeating the vague observation that the trends were 'non-frequently' illustrated. Improving the variety of cohesive devices and ensuring each paragraph has a clear thematic focus would improve the score.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive, with frequent misuse of collocations. For example, the student uses 'closures shop' and 'openings shop' repeatedly, which is grammatically awkward and unnatural. Phrases like 'took the least place' and 'demonstrate very shortly' are imprecise and do not convey the intended meaning clearly. There is a lack of variety in reporting verbs and descriptive adjectives. To improve, the student should focus on learning specific collocations related to data description, such as 'a downward trend', 'a significant increase', or 'remained stable', and avoid repeating the same noun phrases throughout the text.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Subject-verb agreement is inconsistent, such as 'This graphs demonstrate' and 'the number of closures shop was'. There are also issues with article usage and word order, such as 'the number of closures shop took the least place'. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the response from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of plural/singular nouns would significantly improve the accuracy of the writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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