Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-20
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 4.0)
The illustration gives information about the shops closed and new shops opened in a country. Overall, in 2018, the new shops opened were greater than the shops that were closed.
It is quite evident from the bar graph that the number of shops mentioned by short lines, these shops opening and closing were goes down from 8500 to 4000, in the first year. After first year, the number of shops had increased next two years, aproximately 2100 number of shops increased. In year 2014 to 2015, the number of shops goes decrease again and remains constant for next two years.
Furthermore, the black line shows that in the first three years, the number of shops closing and opening almost remains constant. But in 2015, a sudden decrease in the shops opening and closing numbers, and only remains aproximately 600 shops. After 2015, the number of shops again increases and remains constant at the starting value.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The student attempts to address the prompt by describing trends in shop closures and openings between 2011 and 2018. However, there are significant factual inaccuracies in interpreting the data. For instance, the overview incorrectly claims that in 2018 new shops opened were greater than closed, whereas the data shows closures at 5,200 and openings at 3,000. Furthermore, the description of 2015 confuses the two trends, stating there was a drop to approximately 600 shops, which actually corresponds to the dip in closures (600 in 2015), while openings were at 4,000. The student also misidentifies the visual aid as a bar graph rather than a line graph. While some main features are touched upon, the lack of accurate data reporting restricts the task achievement score to Band 4.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The response is divided into three paragraphs, providing a basic structural framework with an introduction, an overview, and body details. However, the logical progression is weak and confusing due to unclear referencing (e.g., mixing up the lines and categories). Cohesive devices are minimal and often misused or mechanical, such as 'It is quite evident from the bar graph that...' and 'Furthermore, the black line shows...'. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion fails to guide the reader smoothly through the data comparisons, leading to a fragmented and difficult-to-follow narrative. This performance aligns with the Band 4.0 descriptors for cohesion and logical flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive, heavily relying on simple terms like 'shops', 'closed', 'opened', 'increased', and 'decreased'. There are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and awkward word choices, such as referring to the lines as 'short lines' and 'black line', and phrasing like 'the number of shops mentioned by short lines, these shops opening and closing were goes down'. Spelling and word formation are generally acceptable for simple words, but the limited range and lack of precision prevent the response from achieving a higher band. This demonstrates characteristics consistent with a Band 4.0 level in lexical resource.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The student displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying mostly on simple sentences with frequent attempts at complex clauses that result in severe structural errors. Examples of non-standard grammar and tense confusion include 'were goes down', 'After first year, the number of shops had increased next two years, aproximately 2100 number of shops increased', and 'only remains aproximately 600 shops'. Errors are pervasive and frequently cause strain or misunderstanding for the reader, particularly when attempting to construct longer sentences. Punctuation is also sparse and faulty. Consequently, this warrants a Band 4.0 for grammatical range and accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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