Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In this picture, it is illustrated that how many shops are opened and closed from 2011 to 2018.

Firstly, about 8500 shops were closed but after some time it shown a great progress and reduce to 4000. While, opening of shops is reducing from 5000 to 4000. However, after that they both were increasing but openning take a turn and start decreasing and shown its worst and the closing start decreasing and stay same for a long time. At the same time opening shown a great progress of increasing from 1000 to 5000 and then remain constant and start increasing gradually while closing start deacreasing.

This graph is mainly representing that when the opening starts increasing closing automaticaly start decreasing. Opening is showing a progress after every

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response4.0
Coherence and Cohesion4.0
Lexical Resource4.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy4.5
Overall4.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 150 words, stopping abruptly at 127 words. Content-wise, the student attempts to summarise the graph, but the data is severely misread and confused throughout the text (e.g., stating 'about 8500 shops were closed' in 2011 when closures were actually 6,400, and confusing openings and closures). Key trends are poorly reported, and the overview at the end is incomplete due to the truncation. Because of the under-length penalty and the significant inaccuracies in data interpretation, the response falls into the lower band range.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The text lacks clear overall progression and logical organisation. Paragraphing is weak, consisting of a short opening sentence, a single massive block of text containing multiple contrasting ideas, and a trailing sentence that cuts off mid-thought. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or repetitively (e.g., 'Firstly', 'While', 'However, after that'), making it difficult for the reader to follow the sequence of data. Referencing is also confusing as it is often unclear whether the student is referring to shop openings or closures.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, relying on elementary terms such as 'opened', 'closed', 'increasing', and 'decreasing'. There are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as 'opening take a turn', 'shown its worst', and 'openning' (spelling error). The limited range of vocabulary is barely adequate to describe visual data, and errors occasionally cause confusion for the reader.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response features a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on basic active sentences with frequent errors. There are issues with subject-verb agreement and tense consistency (e.g., 'it shown a great progress and reduce', 'closing start deacreasing'). Complex structures are attempted but are frequently faulty and awkward. Punctuation and sentence boundaries are also poorly controlled, leading to run-on structures that hinder readability.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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