Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph showing the numbers of shops which is closed and new open in the decades of 2011 to 2018.

overall, The line graph is illustarate with graph which is gradually down in the time of 2011 to 2018.as you can see in the time of 2011 eight thousand five hundred shops were opend and 5500 were closed. in 2012 with the numbers of 3900 shops were opened and 6000 were closed .in the year of 2013 its gradually up with the number of 5000 and the closing is almost at same point growing with 6100 in 2014.by the time of 2015 the opening numbers is constant and the closing numbers is at least point with 500.In the year of 2016 and 2017 there was a stable connection with graph but in last yearof 2018 the opening numbers of shops is decreasing with 3000 and the closing numbers is with 5100.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The student attempts to address the prompt by describing trends in shop closures and openings between 2011 and 2018. However, the response fails to provide an effective overview, presenting a fragmented and confusing summary instead. Furthermore, there are several significant inaccuracies in reporting the data; for instance, the student states that in 2011 "eight thousand five hundred shops were opend and 5500 were closed" (whereas closures were actually 6,400) and describes the 2015 dip in closures as "at least point with 500" (the actual value being 600, though this is close). The lack of clear comparative features and the inclusion of confusing, non-standard descriptions mean the task is only partially addressed, earning a band score of 5.0.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response suffers from severe organizational and structural issues. The text is presented almost as a single, dense block of writing with improper paragraphing, as the attempted overview is lumped together with the main body details. There is a complete lack of standard cohesive devices, and transitions between sentences are jarring and mechanical (e.g., "in 2012 with the numbers of..."). Referencing is often unclear, such as "stable connection with graph", making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of information. These weaknesses place the response firmly in the band 4.5 to 5.0 range, warranting a 5.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The student demonstrates a very limited and repetitive vocabulary range. Throughout the text, basic and incorrect lexical choices are used, such as "shops which is closed and new open", "illustarate with graph", and "stable connection with graph". Word forms and collocations are frequently misused, such as "the opening numbers is constant" or "the closing numbers is at least point". There is little evidence of less common vocabulary or flexibility, and spelling/word-choice errors are pervasive throughout the text, constraining communication and resulting in a band score of 4.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

Grammatical control is extremely weak throughout the response. The student relies on rudimentary sentence structures, and nearly every attempt at complex or descriptive phrasing contains severe grammatical errors. Examples include basic subject-verb agreement failures ("the numbers of shops which is closed", "the opening numbers is decreasing"), tense confusion ("were opend", "is illustarate"), and fragmented, run-on structures ("overall, The line graph is illustarate with graph which is gradually down in the time of 2011 to 2018.as you can see..."). Punctuation and capitalization are also heavily neglected. Due to the high frequency of errors impeding comprehension, a band score of 4.0 is appropriate.

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