Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph compares the figure for the number of shops that closed and the number of recent shops that opened in a country from 2011 to 2018.
Overall, the numbers for both declined but the more significant decline was noticed in the number of fresh shops that opened than the number of shops that closed throughout the period.
In 2011, the number of newly opened shops stood at 8,500 approximately which decreased dramatically to 4,000 approximately in 2012. However, after this an incline was noted in 2013 before coming again back to 4,000 in 2015. Then before decreasing to 3,000 in 2018 the numbers remained almost the same for two years.
On the other hand, in the start the number of shop closures slightly decreased before reaching its peak in 2012, which was approximately 7,100. Then the figure plunged to the bottom of the chart, which was 800 approximately in 2015, after that it escalated in 2016 up to 5,000 roughly. After that, the figure remained stable untlil 2018.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response covers all parts of the task by reporting the main features and making comparisons between shop openings and closures. However, some of the data reported contains inaccuracies or reverses the trends shown in the graph. For instance, the text states that shop closures reached a peak in 2012 and plunged to a bottom in 2015, but then describes closures escalating to 5,000 in 2016, whereas the graph indicates a sharp drop in 2015 followed by a recovery. Furthermore, the overview mentions that numbers for both declined, but shop closures actually ended higher in 2018 than they started in 2011. These inaccuracies and under-developed overview points place the task achievement at this level.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response is arranged coherently with a clear overall progression from an introduction to an overview and subsequent body paragraphs detailing the trends. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate openings and closures. However, referencing and cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical, such as the repetitive use of transition words like 'Then' and 'After that' to introduce new sentences. While the logical flow is generally maintained, these mechanical cohesive devices prevent the text from achieving a higher band.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The writer uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items and descriptive verbs such as 'plunged', 'escalated', and 'incline'. However, there are some word choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as using 'recent shops' instead of 'new shops', 'an incline was noted' rather than 'an upward trend' or 'an increase', and phrasing like 'coming again back'. Spelling is generally accurate, and vocabulary errors do not impede communication, satisfying the requirements for this band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response employs a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as introductory clauses ('In 2011, the number of newly opened shops stood at...'). However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, including awkward positioning of adverbs ('stood at 8,500 approximately', '800 approximately') and missing punctuation commas in complex sentences. Attempts at complex clauses can be somewhat faulty or clumsy, and these persistent errors occasionally cause mild difficulty for the reader, aligning with the descriptors for this level.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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