Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The graph shows that the number of shops in one country that closed during the time of 2011 to 2018 and that opened new shops in one country. The graph show the information between these years.

In the graph that which closures the shop in one country about 87000 in the year of 2011 and the open new shop about 65000 in the year 2011. The closures shops continue decreased in 2012 and reached about 4000 and the opened new shop also decreased. After year in 2013 open new shop slightly increased furthermore, closure shop reised about 61000. Aftrer the year 2014 open new shops heavily decreased in the year 2015 and reached 700 after the year the new shop slightly above 51000 and the last this year the new shop are same. The closure shop decreased every year and the last closure shop in 2018 reached 3000 in one country.

In the graph i saw the shops in one country the open new shop and the closure shop between the years of 2011 and 2018 both are decreased in every year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response addresses the task only partially, presenting inaccurate and confused data from the graph. While the student attempts to report figures for shop closures and openings between 2011 and 2018, the numbers cited (such as 87000 or 65000) are wildly incorrect and bear no relation to the actual scale of the chart. Furthermore, the overall trends are misreported, as the student concludes that both closures and openings decreased every year. The information is heavily distorted, meaning the main features and comparisons are not accurately or meaningfully communicated.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

Information and ideas are not arranged coherently. The text is broken into short paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is difficult to follow due to repetitive and circular statements, particularly in the concluding paragraph where the student reiterates the initial premise awkwardly ('In the graph i saw the shops...'). While some basic cohesive markers like 'After year' or 'in the year' are attempted, referencing is frequently unclear, and the lack of logical sequencing creates confusion for the reader regarding the chronology of the data.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive, frequently straining the reader's comprehension. The student relies heavily on simple terms like 'shop', 'closed', 'opened', 'decreased', and 'year', while attempts at less common vocabulary or varied phrasing result in awkward collocations and incorrect word forms, such as 'closure shop' instead of 'shop closures' or 'reised' instead of 'rose'. Word choice errors and imprecise language occur throughout the text, limiting the clarity of the response.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response displays a very limited range of structures, with frequent errors that constantly distort meaning and impede communication. Simple sentence attempts are often faulty, and complex structures are missing or severely disrupted by poor syntax and missing verbs (e.g., 'The graph that which closures the shop...'). There are persistent errors in verb tenses, word order, and prepositions, alongside a complete lack of proper punctuation control, leading to run-on sentences and fragmented phrasing.

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