Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The data provided shows the number of shops that shut down and number of newly opened shops in a country.

Overall, the graph shows the number of shops that closed down, expereinced a decline and the number of newly opened shops have rose between the years [redacted phone].

The number of newly opened shops experienced a dramatic decline from approximately 7000 to around 4000 between 2011 and 2012, followed by an increase from the years 2012 to 2014, falling again to around 4000 in 2015. It remained steady with a slight increase till 2016 and fall again to reach around 3000 in 2018. Secondly. the number of opened shops have seena slight decline from 2011 to 2012, dropping from approximately 6500 to about 6000, and rose to around 7000 in 2013, went through a fluctuation to around 6500 in 2013 before dropping to approximately 500 in 2015, rose again to a staggering number of around 5500 and remained steady with minor fluctuation till 2018.

From the year 2014 to 2015 both newly opened and closed shops experienced a decline in their numbers. Both have remained steady with a minor fluctuation from 2016 to 2017.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify both series and attempt to describe their overall movement, but the account contains major inaccuracies that make the key features unclear. The opening trend is reversed: shop openings fell from about 8,500 in 2011 to 3,900 in 2012, not from 7,000 to 4,000, while closures were about 6,400 and 5,900 respectively. The later description also confuses the series: closures fell to roughly 600 in 2015, whereas openings were around 4,000. The overview that closures declined and openings rose is not supported across the period; by 2018 both were below their 2011 levels. Focus on accurate, clearly labelled comparisons and identify the sharp 2015 fall in closures as a standout feature.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic paragraph structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details and a final comparison. However, progression is weakened by unclear sequencing and repeated or confusing references. For example, “Secondly” introduces the closure figures as though they were a separate point, but the preceding paragraph has already discussed openings without clearly distinguishing the series. The phrase “fluctuation … in 2013” repeats a year and makes the timeline difficult to follow. The final paragraph repeats the 2014–15 decline and 2016–17 stability rather than adding a clear concluding comparison. Organise the body into one paragraph per series, or compare both series year by year, and use accurate labels consistently.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of trend vocabulary, including “dramatic decline,” “remained steady,” “slight increase,” and “fluctuation,” which helps communicate changes. However, some choices are inaccurate or awkward for describing a graph. “A staggering number” is evaluative and does not suit a neutral report, while “newly opened shops” and “number of opened shops” are used inconsistently for the two categories. There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, such as “expereinced” and “seena.” Choose precise, neutral terms and keep the series labels distinct throughout. For example, use “shop openings” and “shop closures,” and describe a value as “approximately 5,200” rather than calling it staggering.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt longer sentences with time clauses and trend descriptions, but control is uneven, and errors sometimes make relationships between events difficult to understand. In the overview, “the number … experienced a decline and the number … have rose” combines mismatched verb forms and agreement. The sentence beginning “The number of newly opened shops experienced…” shifts between past-tense forms and ends with “fall again,” while “have remained steady” does not match the past-time period being described. Punctuation also causes problems: “Secondly.” is an incomplete transition, and the long sentence that follows contains several changes without clear sentence boundaries. Practise consistent past-tense reporting and divide sequences of changes into shorter, complete sentences.

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