Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given line graph illustrate the value of shops that are closed and open in year 2011 to 2018.

Overall, the line graph show increashing and decreassing point of numbers of shops. Te he graph represent two different lines one is dotid line and the other is a simple line. The starting point of dotid line between 8000 to 9000 and its end point is 3000. On the other hand the starting point of simple line is between 6000 to 7000. And its end is up to 5000 and less than 5500.

Year's are mantioned in statement but did not show in graph only lines are drawing on the place of year's. So the simple line is decrease when they reached on first line its value some time increase and some time decrease when they reached on fifth line his value is less than 1000 but in the next year his value is increase and up to 5000 and then his value is mostly same at the end point

On the other hand the dotid line start at very highest point but he decrease and less than 4000 and the when he reached at the fourth line he increase his increasing and decreasing story is start but his end is equal to 3000.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify that the graph compares shop closures and openings and mention their starting and ending levels, so the response is connected to the task. However, the main trends are only minimally reported, and several descriptions are inaccurate or unclear. For example, the openings line starts at about 8,500, but it does not simply decline: it falls to around 3,900, rises to 6,200 by 2014, then ends at 3,000. The closures line also drops sharply to about 600 in 2015 before recovering, a key feature that you notice but do not explain clearly. Give a concise overview of these contrasting patterns, then select accurate figures to support them.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has separate paragraphs and attempts to compare the two lines, using phrases such as “Overall” and “On the other hand.” These provide some basic organisation. However, the information does not progress clearly from an overview to a systematic account of the trends. References such as “first line,” “fifth line,” and “his value” make it difficult to know which year or series you mean, while the final paragraph repeats general comments about increases and decreases rather than presenting a clear sequence. Organise the report by series or by time period, name “closures” and “openings” consistently, and use years to anchor each change.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use a basic range of task-related vocabulary, including “line graph,” “starting point,” “end point,” “increase,” and “decrease,” which allows the reader to recognise the topic. However, vocabulary is repetitive and several choices or spellings make the description less clear, such as “dotid line,” “increasing and decreasing story,” and “value of shops that are closed and open.” Use precise terms for the data and avoid describing a line as having a “story.” Spelling errors such as “increashing,” “decreassing,” and “mantioned” also weaken control. Building a small set of accurate trend verbs and graph terms would make your account more concise and easier to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including comparisons beginning “On the other hand,” but control is inconsistent and errors frequently affect clarity. For example, “The given line graph illustrate” has subject–verb disagreement, and “the line graph show” repeats this problem. The sentence “when they reached on first line its value some time increase” has unclear pronoun reference and faulty tense and sentence structure. Articles, plurals, and punctuation are also unreliable, as in “Year's are mantioned in statement.” Practise accurate present-tense descriptions of graphs, with a clear subject in each clause—for example, “Closures fell to about 600 in 2015, then rose”—before attempting longer sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.