Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Details pertaining to numerous shops, which are closed and the proportion of newly opend shops in one of the countries from 2011 and 2018 are depicted by the provided line graph.

Overall, it can be clearly seen that the opening and closures of shops went down from 2011 to 2018. It was fluctuated between around 500 and 8,500 numbers of shops.

Scrutinizing deeper into the provided line graph, the numbers of shops, which are closed decreased significantly from 6,500 to 500 between 2014 and 2015. On the other hand, it plunged between 500 and approximetly 5,200 in the year 2016.

Digging deeper into the obtainable information, the opening of shops in between 2015 and 2016 remain steady at 4,000 numbers of shops. In the year 2012, the numbers of shops, which are opening was rose steeply from 4,000 to around 6,100 at the year of 2014.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies the topic and reports a few relevant movements, especially the sharp fall in closures from about 6,500 in 2014 to roughly 600 in 2015 and the recovery to around 5,200 in 2016. However, the overview is inaccurate: both series did not simply decline overall, since closures ended near 5,200 after fluctuating, while openings fell from about 8,500 to 3,000. The account also misreports the openings trend: 2012 was about 3,900, rising to 6,200 by 2014, rather than rising from 4,000. Most years and key comparisons are omitted, so the task is addressed only minimally. The response is also four words below the required minimum. Add a precise overview and cover the main highs, lows and end-point comparison.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: an introduction is followed by an overview and two detail paragraphs, and phrases such as “On the other hand” and “In the year 2012” signal relationships. However, the progression is not consistently clear because the details jump between years and series without a systematic comparison. The overview’s broad claim that both measures went down also conflicts with the later description of closures recovering in 2016. Repeated openings such as “Scrutinizing deeper” and “Digging deeper” make the linking feel formulaic, while the reference to “it” in “It was fluctuated” is unclear. Group the data by series or by notable periods, and use concise, accurate transitions to guide the reader.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The response shows some range through expressions such as “decreased significantly,” “plunged,” and “remain steady,” and the topic is generally recognisable. However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for describing a graph: “proportion” suggests a percentage, “obtainable information” is awkward, and “numbers of shops, which are closed” is unnecessarily wordy. There are also spelling errors in “opend” and “approximetly,” and repeated phrases such as “Digging deeper” limit flexibility. These issues make the description less precise, although the main subject remains understandable. Prefer standard data-reporting language and check spelling and collocations; for example, use “number of shop closures” and “shop openings” consistently.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts longer sentence forms, including relative clauses such as “shops, which are closed,” but control is inconsistent and the range remains limited. Several verb forms and sentence patterns are faulty: “It was fluctuated” should be “It fluctuated,” “the opening … remain steady” needs past-tense agreement, and “was rose steeply” should be “rose steeply.” The final sentence also has an unclear construction around “from 4,000 to around 6,100 at the year of 2014.” Articles, plurals and prepositions are not consistently controlled, as in “in one of the countries from 2011 and 2018.” Use direct past-tense clauses and check agreement and sentence structure before adding complex phrasing.

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