Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph gives information about the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Overall,it can be seen that the number of oppening shops showed a significant decline during the period,dispite some fluctuations .Smililarly,shop closures fluctuated considerably,reaching a dramatic low in 2015 before recovering in the following years.

in 2011,approximately 8500 shops closed,compared with around 6000 new shops that opened. The number of closires then fell sharply to about 4000 in 2012,before rising gradually tto 5000 in 2013 and approximately 6000 in 2014.meanwhile,new shop openings decressed slightly to roughly 5900 in 2012,then climed to a peak of around 7100 in 2013 brfore falling to 6400 in 2014.

in 2015, the number of new shop openings dropped dramatically to only about 3000 whereas closures stood at approximately 3800 however, openings recoverd sharply to around 5000 in 2016 and remained relatively stable at just under this figure untill 2018. in contrast, shops closures stayed at around 3800 in 2016 and 2017,before declining to approximately 2500 in the final year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies the two series and gives an overview of their broad movement, including the sharp low in 2015 for closures and the general decline in openings. However, the figures and series are repeatedly confused, which makes the account only minimally successful as a summary of this graph. For example, the 2011 figures are reversed: openings were about 8,500 and closures about 6,400. The 2015 low for closures was approximately 600, not 3,800, and the later closure figures are also misreported. Openings did not recover to around 5,000 in 2016; they were about 4,000. To improve, check each series against the graph and select a few accurate comparisons to support the overview.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs covering successive periods. Time markers such as “in 2011,” “then,” and “in 2015” help the reader follow the intended chronology, and contrasts between the series are attempted. However, progression is weakened by inaccurate comparisons and by transitions that do not clearly signal which series is being described. For instance, “meanwhile” introduces openings after the preceding sentences have already confused the series. Some sentences also run together, particularly the final paragraph, where “however” needs clearer punctuation and separation. Use one paragraph per series or clearly signpost each series, and connect comparisons with accurate, explicit references.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

There is some useful task vocabulary, including “fluctuated,” “decline,” “dramatic low,” “peak,” and “remained relatively stable.” These choices show an attempt to describe trends rather than simply list figures. However, spelling errors are frequent and sometimes make the text less fluent, as in “oppening,” “dispite,” “Smililarly,” “closires,” “decressed,” and “recoverd.” Some trend descriptions are also imprecise: “rose gradually” does not accurately describe the change from 2012 to 2013, and “stayed” is less formal than suitable alternatives. Proofread carefully and choose verbs that match the size and direction of each change; accurate vocabulary will make the comparisons clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response attempts a mix of sentence forms, including comparisons with “compared with,” contrast clauses using “whereas,” and a relative clause in “reaching a dramatic low.” These structures are appropriate for describing a graph, and the intended meaning is generally recoverable. However, punctuation and sentence boundaries are inconsistent: the overview begins with a lowercase “in,” and the final paragraph joins clauses around “however” without adequate punctuation. Commas are often attached to the preceding word, and full stops are sometimes followed immediately by a lowercase sentence opening. There are also occasional problems with sentence construction, such as the unclear contrast in “whereas closures stood … however, openings recovered.” Practise separating independent clauses and consistently punctuating complex comparisons.

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