Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graphs compares the number closed shops and the number of new shops open in one country in a period from 2011 to 2018.
Overall, the number of new opeing shop flucated over the period, while shop closure showed dramatical delined in 2015 before recovering the following year. in 2018, shops openeing outnumbered closures.
In 2011, approximately 8500 new shops opened, comparef with around 6500 shop closure. The number of opening fell sharply to 4000 in 2012, before rising gradually to about 6200 in 2014. However, it declined again to 4000 in 2015 and reamin steady untill 2017, at approximately 4,200. In the final year , the figure dropped to 3000, its lowest point in 2018.
Meanwhile, shop closure descreased slightly from around 6500 in 2011 to 5900 in 2012, before reaching peak of approximatly 7200 in 2013. The figure then fell to 6,500 in 2014 and plunged to just 600 in 2015. However, closures recovered significantly to around 5,200 in 2016. After a slight decline to 5,000 in 2017, the number rose to approximately 5,200 in 2018.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You cover both shop openings and closures and provide a clear overview of their contrasting patterns, including the sharp fall in closures in 2015 and the recovery afterwards. Most figures and trends are accurately reported, and the final comparison that openings were lower than closures in 2018 is also correct. The account is relevant and includes useful detail across the period. However, the overview could identify the most important overall comparisons more fully—for example, openings began at their peak and ended at their lowest point, while closures fluctuated but finished close to their starting level. Also, the openings figure is described as steady until 2017, although it rises slightly from 4,000 to about 4,200. A more precise overview and comparison would strengthen the response.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response is organised effectively into an introduction, an overview, and separate paragraphs for openings and closures. This makes the two series easy to follow, and the chronological sequencing within each paragraph is generally clear. Linking expressions such as “before,” “however,” and “meanwhile” help show changes and contrasts, so the response meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some features of stronger progression. To make cohesion more flexible and precise, avoid relying on the same sequence of “before” and “however” constructions, and ensure each link accurately reflects the data: openings did not remain entirely steady through 2017. The overview could also connect the two series directly, rather than presenting their main patterns separately.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use a relevant range of trend vocabulary, including “fell sharply,” “reaching peak,” “plunged,” “recovered significantly,” and “slight decline.” These choices communicate the main movements and show an attempt to use more specific language than basic verbs such as “go up” or “go down.” However, spelling and word-form errors are noticeable, including “opeing,” “flucated,” “delined,” “descreased,” and “approximatly.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “new opeing shop” and “shop closure.” These errors limit the accuracy and flexibility of the vocabulary. Check spelling carefully and use consistent, natural forms such as “shop openings” and “shop closures.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You use a mixture of simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses with “before,” “while,” and “although”-type contrasts, and most of the data remains understandable. There are, however, some errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and punctuation. For example, “The line graphs compares” has a plural subject with a singular verb, while “the number of new shops open” needs a grammatical form such as “shops that opened.” The overview begins “in 2018” with an unnecessary lowercase start, and “reaching peak” is missing an article. Several sentences also have spacing or comma issues. Review subject–verb agreement and article use, and proofread sentence boundaries and punctuation to improve control.
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