Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph illustrated the figure of shops closure and newly established shops in a particular country between 2011 and 2018.
Overall, both entities experienced fluctuation over the timeframe. Although closed shops declined sharply in 2015, but again rose rapidly in the following year and dominated the number of newly opened shops over the period.
In 2011, arround 8,500 new shoped established, and fell to 3,900 in the next year. After a gradual increase of consective two years the overall count rose to 6,200 by 2014. In 2015, the figure reduced one more time falling to 4,000 and remained unchanged untill 2016. The total numbers decreased to 4,000 in 2018 after a steady increase in 2017.
The amount of closed shops started from 6,300 and sharply decreased to 5,900 in 2012. By 2013, total count climbed to 7,100 recorded the higest closed shops number in the whole time period, but moderately declined to 6,500 in 2014. In 2015, shops closures dramatically reduced to lowest value of 500, and significantly soar to 5,200. Although the number of closed shops slightly decreased to 5,000 in 2017,they were steadily increase again to 5,200 by the end of 2018.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You cover both shop openings and closures and include a clear overview of their fluctuations, highlighting the sharp fall in closures in 2015 and their recovery the following year. Most figures are close to the chart, including the opening peak of about 8,500 and the closure peak of about 7,100. However, the overview says closures “dominated” openings over the period, which is not accurate: openings were higher in 2011, while closures exceeded them in several later years. There are also specific reporting errors: openings fell to about 3,000, not 4,000, in 2018, and the closure low in 2015 was about 600 rather than 500. A more precise overview and careful checking of comparisons would make the key features clearer and more complete.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction and overview are followed by separate paragraphs for openings and closures. This makes the two data series easy to follow, and time markers such as “In 2015” and “By 2013” help establish sequence. Some connections are less clear or mechanically expressed, however. In the overview, “Although … but” uses two contrasting linkers together, and “the following year” could be made more explicit by naming 2016. The openings paragraph also ends with a confusing sequence: “decreased to 4,000 in 2018 after a steady increase in 2017,” although the 2018 value is about 3,000. Use linking phrases selectively and ensure each sentence connects the correct year and figure.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “fluctuation,” “sharply decreased,” “climbed,” and “moderately declined.” These choices help communicate changes across the period, and the meaning is generally understandable. Some word forms, spelling, and collocations are inaccurate, though: “shops closure,” “new shoped established,” “consective,” “higest,” and “significantly soar” reduce precision and polish. “Dominated” is also an imprecise choice for describing which series had higher values, especially because openings were higher in 2011. Aim for standard chart language such as “the number of shops that closed,” “new shops opened,” and “rose sharply,” and check spelling and word forms before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning “Although” and “By 2013,” and most of the trends remain understandable. Some grammatical errors persist in sentence construction, verb forms, agreement, and punctuation. For example, “Although closed shops declined sharply in 2015, but again rose” incorrectly combines two contrasting structures; use either “Although …, they rose again” or “They declined … but rose again.” The final sentence has a tense/agreement problem in “they were steadily increase,” and “recorded the higest …” lacks a clear grammatical subject. There are also missing spaces after commas. Practise accurate clause patterns and maintain consistent past-tense reporting to improve control.
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