Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The above graph is about the shops that closed and opened in country between 2011 to 2018. In graph there is one solid line and one dotted line. Closed shops are represented by solid line while opened shops are represented by dotted line.We can see clear difference in opened and closed shops in 2011. About 8500 shops opened in 2011 while 6500 closed. The number of closed shops is drastically going down down in 2015 while the maximum number is in 2013. Same as the number of opened shop is high in 2011 and low in 2018. 2014 is the year where the number of closed and opened shops is almost equal.In 2017 the difference between closed and opened shops is almost 1000. 2015 is the best year for closed shops because less than 1000 shops are closed in that year. The graph shows the increasing number of closed shops with time.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the two series and report several relevant comparisons, including the high point for openings in 2011, the peak in closures in 2013, and the sharp fall in closures in 2015. However, the response gives only a limited account of the overall pattern and includes a major factual error: closures did not increase over time; they ended below their 2011 level after fluctuating. The claim that 2015 was the “best year” is also unclear and does not suit a neutral summary. Some figures are inaccurate, such as giving 6,500 closures in 2011 rather than approximately 6,400. A clearer overview of both series and more accurate, selected comparisons are needed for a fuller response to the task.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response follows a basic sequence, beginning with an introduction and then mentioning selected years and comparisons. This gives the reader some sense of the topic, but the ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs or a sustained overview followed by supporting details. Several points appear abruptly, such as the 2017 comparison and the judgement that 2015 was the “best year,” and the final claim about an increase contradicts the earlier description of a sharp fall. Linking is sparse, while “Same as” does not clearly connect the comparison. Group the information into an overview and a detail paragraph, and use clear transitions to show how the figures relate.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough basic vocabulary to identify the graph’s subject and describe movement, including “drastically going down” and “maximum number.” However, the range is limited and some choices are imprecise or unsuitable for a formal data summary. “Best year” expresses an opinion rather than describing the figures, and “opened shops” is less natural than “shop openings” in this context. Repetition of “number,” “shops,” and “closed/opened” also limits variety. More precise trend language and accurate collocations would make the report clearer and more academic, for example describing a figure as a peak, a low point, or a fluctuation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You communicate the main subject using mostly simple sentence patterns, and some sentences are understandable, such as “2014 is the year where the number of closed and opened shops is almost equal.” However, the range is limited, and frequent errors affect accuracy. Examples include “in country” (missing an article), “between 2011 to 2018” (incorrect preposition pattern), and “number of opened shop” (number agreement). The sentence “The number of closed shops is drastically going down down in 2015” has awkward tense use and repeated wording, while missing spaces after full stops and commas weaken punctuation. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and combine simple clauses with controlled comparisons.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.