Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrates the ratio of closed and newly opened shops in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Overall, the most noticeable feature is the number of variations shown in closed shops shows a rise at first and then stayed moderate till the end. While newly opened shops shows drastic decrease in both the years .

In detail, the number of shops that were closed started around 6000 showed an upwards trend followed by a sudden drop around 0 and shows the sudden increase around 5000 and stayed moderate in both the years. However, the number of shops that were newly opened started at its peak which was approximately 8000 and showed maximum fluctuations in downward trend with a drastic drop around 4000, a sudden rise approximately 6000 was seen followed by intense fall of 3000.

Subsequently, the ratio of closed and newly opened shops both showed the highest conflits between the years which was around 6000 in 2011 to 2018.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify both series and give a broad account of their movement, including the sharp fall in closures and the overall decline in openings. However, the overview is unclear and does not accurately summarise the main pattern: closures fluctuate rather than simply rise and then remain moderate, while openings do not show a steady downward trend. Some details are also inaccurate or too vague. For example, closures begin at about 6,400, not 6,000, and the 2015 figure is around 600, not zero; openings peak at about 8,500 in 2011. The final claim about the “highest conflits” around 6,000 is not a clear or supported comparison. Select the key highs, lows and end-point contrast, and report them precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and a detail paragraph, and it attempts to guide the reader with phrases such as “Overall,” “In detail” and “However.” This provides some organisation. However, progression is difficult to follow because several trends are compressed into long, unclear sentences, and the final paragraph repeats the comparison without adding a coherent point. The overview’s “While” clause is also left as a fragment, and “Subsequently” does not clearly connect the final claim to the preceding information. Organise the body by series or by major changes, and use linking words only when the relationship between ideas is clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of trend vocabulary, including “drastic decrease,” “fluctuations,” “sudden drop” and “upwards trend,” so the reader can recognise that the graph changes over time. However, several choices are imprecise or unnatural for describing data. “Ratio” suggests a calculated relationship, but the graph shows numbers; “stayed moderate” does not clearly describe a value; and “highest conflits” is not an appropriate expression. Repeating “sudden” and “drastic” also makes the description less precise. Choose vocabulary that names the movement and its scale accurately, such as “fell sharply,” “recovered,” “fluctuated” and “remained relatively stable.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses beginning with “While” and “However,” and the general meaning is often recoverable. However, errors are frequent enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “the number … shows” and “shops … shows”; tense shifts between “started,” “showed” and “shows”; and the overview’s “While newly opened shops shows…” is an incomplete clause. The long sentence beginning “In detail” also joins several events without clear grammatical control. Use past tense consistently for the historical data, check singular “number” against its verb, and divide descriptions into shorter, complete sentences.

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