Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The chart illustrates the number of shops that closed and opened in one country from 2011 to 2018.

Overall, there are significant fluctuations can be seen in number of shops that are closed and opened during the period. Number of shop closures fall sharply in 2015, while number of shop openings experienced rise and fall and ended at all time low.

There is a very small decline in number of shop closures in first year followed by a rise of one thousand in number reaching approximately 7,000 and then a slight in 2014 followed a major dip reaching to just 500 in 2015. After this year, the number increased again dramatically reaching at five thousand and then the number remain relatively stable until 2018.

the number of shop openings started from eighty five hundred in 2011 followed by a sharp decline hitting the 4,000 then it rose again and touched the 6,000 shop openings. After 2014, the number of shops opened fall again and hit the previous number which was four thousand and it remained unchanged for next two years then in it shown a smooth fall reaching 3000 in number in 2018 which was the all time low of the number of shop openings from 2011 to 2018.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You cover both shop closures and openings and provide a clear overview of the main patterns, especially the dramatic fall in closures in 2015 and the openings’ low point in 2018. Most figures and trends are broadly accurate: for example, openings begin at about 8,500 and finish at 3,000. However, some details are imprecise or unclear. Closures rise from about 5,900 in 2012 to 7,200 in 2013, rather than by only one thousand to approximately 7,000, and the 2014 movement is described only as “a slight” change. The overview could also compare the series more directly, such as noting that openings exceed closures in 2011 and 2015, while closures are higher in most other years.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a sensible overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and separate descriptions of closures and openings. This makes the two data series easy to identify, and phrases such as “After this year” help signal changes over time. However, progression within the detail paragraphs is sometimes weakened by long, loosely connected sentences and unclear links. For example, the closures sentence beginning “There is a very small decline” combines several years and movements without clear punctuation, while “After 2014” does not precisely explain the sequence of changes. Use shorter sentences to group key stages, and make comparisons between the two series explicit. Capitalise the opening “the number” in the final paragraph and use punctuation to separate the stages more clearly.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of trend vocabulary, including “sharp decline,” “dramatically,” “relatively stable,” and “all time low,” which helps communicate the graph’s main movements. Some repetition of “number” and “rise and fall” limits precision, and several expressions are awkward or imprecise, such as “a slight” without a noun and “touched the 6,000 shop openings.” The phrase “the previous number” is also vague when referring to the 4,000 level. Choose concise, conventional chart language and vary the nouns and verbs used to describe changes. More accurate collocations would make the account sound clearer and more controlled without requiring unusually advanced vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including sequences linked with “followed by” and “while,” but grammatical control is inconsistent. The overview sentence “there are significant fluctuations can be seen” combines two structures incorrectly; write either “significant fluctuations can be seen” or “there are significant fluctuations.” Other examples include “the number remain relatively stable,” where subject–verb agreement is missing, and “the number of shops opened fall again,” where the verb form does not match the past-time description. Articles and sentence boundaries are also sometimes missing, as in “in first year” and the uncapitalised start of the final paragraph. Check verb tense and agreement, and divide long sentences into complete clauses.

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