Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of shop closures and openings 2011– 2018

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph demonstartes the information regarding the number of shops and the number of new shops that opened in one nation from 2011 to 2018.

Overall, it is clear that in the start openings stores was the most dominant categorr, whereas closures accounted for the smallest propottion. However, in the end of the period the openings shops has dropped.

In details, the openings shops was the highest figure at approximately 8500, followed by closing shops. In the year 2011 the openings shops is at the top and nest year 2012 its number is darmatically decreased. Moreover, during this period it face miner fluctuation and in the year of 2018 the openings shops is at 3000. On the other hand, the closures of shops is low in 2011 as compare to openings shops which is 2000 less than openings stores. Furthermore, its volume is up ag down and in the year of 2015 the closing shop number is very very low which is roughly 500. In addition, the closing of shops is surg up in 2018 which is 5000 nearly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the two series and cover the full period, with relevant details such as openings peaking at about 8,500 in 2011 and falling to 3,000 by 2018, and closures reaching a very low point in 2015. However, some comparisons are inaccurate or unclear: closures were not the smallest category at the start, since they were about 6,400, and the 2015 closure figure was around 600 rather than 500 (a close estimate). The overview also misses the key contrast that closures fluctuated sharply while openings generally declined after 2011. Develop the main trends more precisely and compare the series at key points, rather than relying on vague descriptions such as “up ag down.”

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph describing the figures. This gives the reader a basic route through the information, and phrases such as “Overall,” “Moreover,” and “On the other hand” show an attempt to connect ideas. However, progression within the detail paragraph is sometimes difficult to follow because the two series are discussed in a loosely ordered way, and several linking expressions do not clarify the relationship between points. For example, “Furthermore” and “In addition” introduce further closure details without a clear sequence. Organise the body by series or by time period, and use comparisons to make the links between figures more explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “openings,” “closures,” “figure,” and “fluctuation,” so the reader can generally identify the subject of each sentence. However, the range and control are limited, and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or awkward, such as “openings stores,” “closing shops,” and “its volume.” Spelling errors, including “demonstartes,” “categorr,” and “propottion,” also make the writing less polished. Some expressions, such as “very very low” and “up ag down,” are informal or unclear for an academic report. Build a more precise set of trend verbs and use standard phrases such as “the number of closures” and “fell sharply.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a contrast introduced by “whereas” and a sentence beginning “On the other hand.” This shows some variety, and the main topic is usually understandable. However, errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur across the response. For instance, “the openings shops was” has incorrect agreement and noun phrasing, while “in the year 2011 the openings shops is at the top” shifts tense and has an awkward structure. “In the end of the period” also uses an incorrect preposition. Use past tense consistently for the historical data, check singular and plural agreement, and practise forming clear comparative sentences.

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