Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years, there has been considerable debate about whether primary schools only focus on formal education while extracurricular activities also play an important part for childrens development as well. I firmly believe that creative abilities has a major impact on students mental and physical strength.

On the one hand, academic syllabus are significantally crucial for children especially in their early growth for developing strong foundation. Because if they concentrate on their formal learning then they strengthen their future educational and professional lives. For example, if pupils have good knowledge about the English, Mathematics and Science then they enhance their abilities in communication skills, logical thinking and also improve their problem solving methods.

On the other hand, co- curricular activities are essential for early education because it has a good impact on childrens body as well as their mind. Those people who focus on their cognitive abilities along with their academics has highly ambitious towards their goals instead who only focus on sigle thing. For instance, if they take part in different games they learn how to manage or deal with their team members. Moreover, they encourage each other while playing a sport in terms of getting a better score and they become more confidient in it.

In conclusion, I agree with intoducing more creative activities on all educational institutions that should has a great impact on students mental health.The government must consider it by advancing their educatinal fields.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You present a relevant position, stating that creative activities matter and concluding that schools should introduce more of them. The response also gives reasons for both formal learning and play, with examples involving academic subjects and teamwork in games. However, the task asks how strongly you agree that schools focus too much on formal learning and how important classroom play is; these points are only partly answered. Your position on the first question is not fully explicit, and the benefits of play are asserted more than explained. The response is also 11 words below the required minimum. Develop each part of the question more fully, for example by explaining how play supports learning alongside academic instruction.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs beginning “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the broad contrast between formal study and activities. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and some links are mechanical or do not express the intended relationship accurately. For example, “Those people who focus on their cognitive abilities along with their academics has highly ambitious towards their goals instead who only focus on sigle thing” is difficult to follow. The conclusion also introduces government action without connecting it clearly to the classroom question. Use clearer topic sentences and link each example directly to the point it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “formal learning,” “cognitive abilities,” “logical thinking,” and “team members.” These choices show an attempt to discuss education and development beyond basic terms. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes meaning less clear: “academic syllabus,” “good impact,” and “getting a better score” are not the most natural expressions in context. Spelling errors such as “significantally,” “confidient,” and “educatinal” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing learning and play, and check spelling and word forms carefully before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if they take part in different games” and a reason clause beginning “Because if they concentrate.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence boundaries occur frequently enough to make some ideas difficult to understand. Examples include “creative abilities has,” “academic syllabus are,” and “those people … has highly ambitious.” The sentence beginning “Because if” is also an incomplete sentence, while the final sentence has a faulty structure: “that should has a great impact.” Practise building complete sentences with one clear main clause, then check subject–verb agreement and verb forms.

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