Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

According to scientific research children brains grow more faster with circulum activities they perform in the schools along with formal learning. Most schools focus on formla learning beacuse of less space for children criculum activities and for sports play grounds. From my perspective, i recommend to add the practical and physical activities with formal studies, which builds the student mind healthy, active and more affective in studies.

Only formal eduction is unsufficient for any genius and naturally sharpe minded student. Formal education is very boring way of learning and students take less interest in studies and want to freedom from this formal teaching method. Sports give students self-confidence. Make them mentally and physically strong. A sportsman student always quite sharpe and genius in competative exams as compared to the student who always educate in formal way of teaching. Todays world there are many international scholarships available for the whose students who are great and exceptional in any sports or had a bright career in the criculum activities during their student life in school, college or in universties.

Always choose that education system in which criculum activies and sports are the part of the schooling. Because bright future of the country depends on the genius students of the nation. So,they will do their best in the advancement of the country, and it is possible only when the education system has not only formal learning. Its country responsibilty to make the education system better by adding some extra activites with formal learning to help the student in better growth of their minds.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question: you argue that formal learning should be combined with physical and extracurricular activities, and you state that play and sport support children’s development. Your position is clear in phrases such as “add the practical and physical activities with formal studies.” The discussion of confidence and mental and physical strength is relevant, but several claims are asserted rather than explained—for example, that sports participants perform better in competitive exams. The response also focuses heavily on sport and scholarships, while the specific importance of play within the primary-school classroom receives less attention. Develop this aspect with a concrete classroom example and explain how play supports learning, rather than relying mainly on broad claims about national progress.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an opening position, supporting paragraphs, and a concluding recommendation. Ideas generally move from the limitations of formal teaching to the benefits of sport and then to the education system. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and links can feel mechanical. For instance, “Always choose that education system” introduces a recommendation without clearly connecting it to the preceding discussion, while “So, they will do their best” has an unclear reference. Some points, such as scholarships and national advancement, are added without enough explanation of how they support the central argument. Use clearer topic sentences, connect each example directly to the question, and make pronoun references explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to education and development, including “self-confidence,” “formal education,” “scholarships,” and “advancement.” These choices help communicate your main position, but the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make parts of the response difficult to read. Examples include “circulum” for “curriculum,” “sharpe” for “sharp,” and “affective” where “effective” appears intended. Phrases such as “freedom from this formal teaching method” and “genius students” are also imprecise or unnatural in context. Build a more accurate set of terms for classroom learning and play, and check spelling and collocations carefully so that your ideas are expressed precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both short statements and some longer structures, including “Because bright future of the country depends on the genius students of the nation.” However, sentence patterns are often simple, and attempts to connect ideas sometimes produce incomplete or awkward constructions. For example, “Sports give students self-confidence. Make them mentally and physically strong” leaves the second sentence without a clear subject, while “Only formal eduction is unsufficient for any genius and naturally sharpe minded student” has problems with article use and sentence construction. There are also errors in agreement and punctuation, as in “Its country responsibilty.” Practise combining related ideas into complete sentences and check articles, subjects, and verb forms.

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