Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There are several reason why people think that primary school focus too much on formal learning. Homewer there are different ways to manage it.

To begin with the first reason, when children became adults, they sometimes don't know how to use basics things or doing essentials things, such as cooking, changing a diaper, manage money etc. The reason is the lack of information and practice they get during the school program.

For exemple, in Germany children start school at 6-7 years old. Before that, they go to kindergarden, were they learn how to play, participate to multiple activities such as cooking, art creation, painting, sport. They also grow up in nature and they are more concern for the environment and know better how to manage the thrash (recycling, compost...). But when they start school, they finished very early (around 2pm), and they have time to do homework but also go to different class. In these class they can learn wathever they want, the class are different in each grade so they can learn something new every year or continue to practice in the same class. The activity can be sport, learning language or art class, but it's necessary to be a pleasure for the children, so they feel like they are playing.

This is very different in France, the kids go to school early the morning and finish late during the afternoon. The parents are also very busy at work so the kids go to the after-school program, wich is most of the time, free playtime in the recees and homework with educators.

I strongly belive that German kids became more independant than French kids and have more skills to start an adult life. I also understand why the french program is very intense and focus on formal learning with longer breaks, wich it leave time for kids to play but not really to particpate to a different activty.

In my opinion, the school program should be similar in a lot of country after all of the research from scientifists, to prove the advantage and disadvateg from each country school porgram. The best program for me would be a morning with sport and formal learning, a long break for lunch and free play time, unformal activities during the afternoon and an another break for snack before homeworks and home routine. Also I think one half day of the week has to be different such as a nature day or field trip to a musuem. It is very important for a child or a teenager to follow the formal program but also to play, take time for themselfs and participate to activites.

In conclusion, the argue is understable and applicable for kids from 3 years old (age of the school in france) to teenager who also need to do acitvities to relax during the exams preparation and to be ready for the student life (know how to manage money, apartment..).

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both questions and make your position clear: you support combining formal learning with play and practical activities. The comparison between Germany and France, followed by your proposed school-day structure, gives the response relevant examples and a practical recommendation. This meets the task well, and the discussion shows some development beyond a simple opinion. However, the first question—whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning—is not answered as directly or consistently as the importance of play. Some claims, such as German children becoming more independent than French children, need clearer support, and the conclusion shifts to teenagers and exam preparation. To strengthen the response, state your degree of agreement explicitly and develop the comparison with more precise evidence linked to primary-school learning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has an overall structure, moving from an introductory position to examples, a recommendation, and a conclusion. Paragraphing helps separate the Germany–France comparison from your own proposed timetable, and phrases such as “To begin with” and “In conclusion” guide the reader. However, progression is not always smooth: the opening promises “several reason” but develops one main reason, and the long paragraph about Germany contains many points without clear internal grouping. Some links are mechanical, while references such as “This is very different” and “the argue” are not fully clear. Organise each body paragraph around one main claim, then explain and illustrate it; use more precise transitions to show whether you are comparing, explaining, or drawing a conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “after-school program,” “recycling,” “compost,” and “field trip,” which helps communicate examples and recommendations. There are also attempts at more specific expressions such as “independent” and “manage money.” However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause, for example “Homewer,” “kindergarden,” “thrash,” and “unformal.” Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “participate to multiple activities” and “a pleasure for the children.” Aim to check spelling carefully and learn common collocations as complete phrases. More precise wording would also help distinguish structured learning, practical skills, and free play rather than relying repeatedly on general terms such as “activities” and “things.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including explanations with “when” and “because” and a longer comparison between the two countries. This allows you to communicate your main ideas, but grammatical control is inconsistent, and errors sometimes make relationships between ideas harder to follow. Examples include “when children became adults,” “they finished very early,” and “the class are different in each grade”; these show problems with tense, agreement, and sentence construction. There are also errors in articles and plural forms, as in “a different activty” and “one half day.” Practise building accurate sentences before extending them: check subject–verb agreement, keep verb tenses consistent, and use punctuation to divide long sentences into clearer units.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.