Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Formal learning is very important for children for their future percepective and to learn discipline however, outdoor sports are also play very crucial role for their physical and mental development. i partially agree that primary schools focus too much on formal learning but not outdoor sports.

formal learning is play very crucial role for students it toughts them discipline, skills which hepls them to achieve their desirable goal. school learning is a basic foundation for any students to build their carrer, for instance, when i studied in class 5 i learnd a simple math which help me a lot till now that how i can calcute any data or collect data for reserch. but i think that only formal learning is not a duty of school they should also focus on outdoor sports or games.

outdoor sports or games are also a duty of school to conduct for children which bosst their confidence and make then physicall and mentally strong. games also help a lot to build future carrer. for ecample, sai global english boarding school organised a tournament for students which help to boost their confidence and some alumini are also a national level player of cricket and many student participate in games and enjoy a lot during tournament.

conclusion, formal learning is very important for student but outdoor games helps children to reduce the burden and stress by participating in games and sport so both are equally important for children either formal learning or outdoor activites for primary school students.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both questions and state a position with “I partially agree,” then explain that formal learning builds discipline and skills while games support children’s development. The examples—a maths lesson from your own schooling and a school cricket tournament—are relevant. However, the discussion remains limited: the first example mainly shows the lasting usefulness of maths, rather than explaining whether schools place too much emphasis on formal learning, and the importance of play in the classroom could be explored more directly. Your conclusion restates the balance but does not add much development. The response is 243 words, seven words below the 250-word minimum; the nine words copied from the prompt are not counted. Develop each reason further and make the extent of your agreement clearer throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs on formal learning and sport, and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the main contrast, and phrases such as “for instance” and “for example” signal supporting details. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and the ideas are linked mechanically through repeated references to “formal learning” and “outdoor sports or games.” The opening paragraph also combines several points in one sentence, while the conclusion begins abruptly with “conclusion.” Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example explicitly to the claim it supports. More varied, accurate linking and clearer references would make the overall argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “discipline,” “physical and mental development,” “confidence,” and “stress.” The examples also give you opportunities to use relevant terms such as “tournament” and “national-level player.” However, the range is limited and several expressions are repeated, particularly “formal learning” and “outdoor sports or games.” Noticeable spelling and word-choice errors—such as “percepective,” “toughts,” “desirable goal,” and “boost their confidence”—sometimes make the reader pause or infer your meaning. Aim for more accurate collocations and a wider range of terms for classroom learning and play. Proofreading spelling and choosing natural phrases will improve clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “however” and “which.” Nevertheless, the range is limited, and longer constructions are often difficult to control. For example, “Formal learning is very important … however, outdoor sports are also play very crucial role” has problems with sentence boundaries and verb structure. There are also recurring errors in agreement and verb forms, as in “games also help … which bosst” and “outdoor games helps children.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, including the lowercase “i” and the comma splice in the opening. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a clearly connected supporting clause, then check subject–verb agreement and punctuation.

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