Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

People are of different opinions on the introduction of formal learning as a part of school education system. This essay agrees that formal learning is also required for the students.

Education given in formal manner provides the information to the students, tecahers and parents. It helps the individuals to learn in a better way. Structured learning is easy to understand and provides more benefit than the unstructured learning.

Learning from the primary level helps the students to cultivate the habbit of doing the tasks and work in a sequential way. Little steps once at a time helps to climb the ladder of the success. Syllabus introduced for the financial year helps the students to learn the things properly. For example , Smart classrooms introduced by the government in schools helps the students to play and learn . Mnemonics helps to memorizes the contents and headings easily.

It is necessary for the children to play along with the classroom studies. Physical activity build confidence and enhances the ability to learn and gasps the information efficiently. Primary Schools need to have a separate set up for the games. Japan is one of the country which has a system of learning iwthout books till the child is 5 years old. In India, the concept of play way schools , kindergardens and anganwadis (a governemnt initative for the children below 5 years of age) has helped the students to learn the basics of the schooling and eventually helped them in future as well.

To conclude, formal learning and physical activities must be a part of primary school classrooms for the better future of the students.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your response addresses both questions: you support formal learning and also state that play is necessary, concluding that both should be included. The examples of smart classrooms, Japan, and Indian play-way schools are relevant, and the final position is understandable. However, the opening says formal learning is required rather than clearly answering whether schools focus on it too much, so your degree of agreement is not fully established. Several points are asserted rather than explained—for instance, the claim that structured learning is more beneficial and that physical activity improves learning would be stronger with a specific explanation or example. Develop the balance between formal lessons and play more directly, and extend fewer examples in greater detail.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs on formal learning and play, and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the two main topics. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the discussion moves from sequential work to a yearly syllabus, smart classrooms, and mnemonics without showing how each point supports the central argument. Connections between ideas are also limited, and phrases such as “For example” do not always introduce a clearly explained example. Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main claim, then link each supporting point back to it. Clearer transitions between the benefits of formal instruction and the role of play would make the argument feel more continuous.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “formal learning,” “structured learning,” “physical activity,” and “mnemonics,” which helps communicate the subject. There is also an attempt to use more specific terms such as “play-way schools” and “anganwadis.” However, word choice and collocation are often awkward or imprecise, as in “introduction of formal learning as a part of school education system,” “cultivate the habbit,” and “gasps the information.” Spelling errors such as “tecahers,” “kindergardens,” and “governemnt” are noticeable and reduce accuracy. Aim for natural academic phrases and check spelling carefully; for example, describe how activity helps children “grasp information” rather than using an inaccurate verb.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple statements and longer sentences, and the overall meaning is generally recoverable. Some sentence patterns are effective, such as “It is necessary for the children to play along with the classroom studies.” However, errors in agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur across the response. For example, “Physical activity build confidence” needs a singular verb, while “Little steps once at a time helps” has a subject–verb agreement problem and an unclear structure. The sentence about Japan (“one of the country which has…”) also needs a plural noun and a more accurate relative clause. Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and verb, and use complex structures only when their relationships are clear.

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