Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Formal learning is too much focused by the primary schools according to some indivuals.The view is all about wheather chidrean should learn and play or just have complete priority on the formal learning. My perspective on this topic is that we should consider to do both have activites as well and also learning.

This world right now is fast pacing era,people should know how to communicate,how to interact with the other person,how to make your social network strong and big so you can be adjusted according to the time.Same goes for the childrean allowing childeran to play at small age changes them a lot they learn new things,they get new ideas,they can talk to interact with people outside their culture and learn many things from that. They can become creative with ideas as seeing new people and environment other than their classroom. Students can make new friends they will learn how to greet people and how to act in front of everyone. Social network gets expanded which can help them in future.

Even sometimes primary students are under stress,can be because of many reasons family issues or homework, allowing them to have fun activities relaxes their mind and they can perform better in thier studies.Playing at young age also makes you physically fit because it involves many diffent kinds of exercises such as running,playing football,or cricket. It helps prevent lazyiness and many diseases at young age because if your body is physcially fit your mind will be aswell.

In my conclusion I would end it with I childrean need both learning physical and also formal,it should be worked in a balance form.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question and make your position clear: children should have a balance of formal learning and activities. Your reasons are relevant, particularly the claims that play can develop communication and creativity, relieve stress, and support physical health. The examples of football and cricket help make the health point concrete. However, some ideas are asserted rather than explained—for instance, that a larger “social network” will help children in the future—and the discussion does not directly assess whether primary schools currently place too much emphasis on formal learning. Develop this comparison by explaining what excessive formal instruction can limit and how classroom play complements learning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs with different benefits of play, and a conclusion. This gives the reader a general sense of progression. However, connections between points are sometimes loose, and the long second paragraph moves through communication, creativity, friendship, and future benefits without clearly grouping or prioritising them. Linking phrases such as “Same goes for” and “Even sometimes” are not always precise, while several ideas are joined in long strings with commas. Use clearer topic sentences and divide related points into shorter sentences. A conclusion that restates the position in a complete, clear sentence would also strengthen the overall organisation.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “formal learning,” “creative,” “physically fit,” and “activities,” and the reader can generally understand your intended meaning. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “fast pacing era,” “social network gets expanded,” and “worked in a balance form.” Spelling errors, including “indivuals,” “wheather,” and “lazyiness,” also make the writing less controlled. Aim for more precise, natural expressions and check spelling carefully. Replacing repeated general words such as “things” with specific terms would help you explain the benefits of play more clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, and the main ideas are usually understandable. However, control is inconsistent: the opening sentence, “Formal learning is too much focused by the primary schools,” has an incorrect passive construction, and the final sentence, “I childrean need both learning physical and also formal,” is difficult to interpret grammatically. There are also run-on sentences, for example the sentence beginning “This world right now is fast pacing era,” where several clauses are joined without appropriate punctuation. Practise forming clear subject–verb sentences, using articles and verb forms accurately, and separating independent clauses with full stops or suitable conjunctions.

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