Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Most of the individuals believe that primary schools should emphasize on formal educational learning. I completely disagree with this opinion because this can not build up their other skills and they will suffer from mental health issues.

Educational learning can only enlarge childrens' knowledge. This will not create their other skills like creativity and problem solving which will help them to get success in life. If a child has the ability to solve any problem or to create any ideas or thing, it will be helpful for them in the future. They can show their capability in their workplace as their creativity and problem solving skills were building from their childhood. By learning from books, can only develope their knowledge which can also be important for their future. For example, there is a report which has shared by the Oxford University that most of the companies are requiring other skills along with the higher degrees as the world is becoming competitive day by day. So, they are recruiting employees who have other basic skills. As a result, it would be helpful for them who were learning some skills since childhood.

On the other hand, it is very important for children to play as well as learning in the primary schools. When a student mostly remain busy with their study, it can give them boredom and also they can feel stress. As they do not get any chance to get rid of their monotonous life, it will impact on their mental health. So, it is better to give them proper time for playing beside their study. By playing, it can improve their physical fitness and mental health also. For example, one of my cousins who was doing his study and not getting time to play, he is now suffering from mental illness. So, his parents are taking him to a psychiatrist and he is suggesting him for playing with other children which can improve his mental health condition.

I firmly believe that primary schools should give chance for playing the children besides their education.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you disagree that primary schools should focus too heavily on formal learning, and you explain that play supports skills beyond academic knowledge as well as children’s wellbeing. You address both questions, with relevant examples about workplace skills and your cousin. However, the first argument is more fully developed than the second: the link between classroom play and later workplace success is asserted rather than clearly explained, and the Oxford University report is vague and not substantiated. The personal example supports the mental-health point, but it would be stronger if you explained how schools can balance play with learning. Develop each reason with a clearer explanation and a specific, credible example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting separate reasons, and a concluding statement. The progression from skills development to wellbeing is easy to follow, and signposts such as “On the other hand” and “For example” help readers recognise the relationships between ideas. At times, however, connections are mechanical or unclear. For instance, “So, it is better to give them proper time” repeats the preceding point rather than advancing it, while “As a result, it would be helpful for them” has an unclear reference. Use more precise links between claims and examples, and make sure pronouns clearly identify the people or ideas they refer to.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary, including “creativity,” “problem solving,” “competitive,” “monotonous,” and “physical fitness,” which allows you to discuss both learning and play. Some attempts at more specific language are effective, but word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive. Phrases such as “emphasize on formal educational learning,” “create their other skills,” and “give them boredom” do not sound natural, and “mental health” is repeated without much variation. Spelling and word-form slips such as “develope” and “childrens’” also reduce accuracy. Build a bank of natural collocations for education and child development, and check spelling and word forms during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures (“If a child has the ability…”) and clauses beginning with “When” and “As.” Most of the meaning remains understandable, but some errors in sentence construction, agreement, and verb forms make parts less smooth. For example, “By learning from books, can only develope their knowledge” lacks a clear subject, and “one of my cousins who was doing his study and not getting time to play, he is now suffering” has an awkward relative-clause structure and inconsistent tense. There are also errors in “most of the individuals believe” and “he is suggesting him.” Practise building accurate complex sentences and check that each clause has a subject and a consistent verb form.

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