Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.5)

The changing global patterns in early child development and education have given rise to a debate that whether primary school children should only focus on formal education or they must be involved in play base learning as well as life skill development. This essay will argue that primary school children need to be provided a balanced learning approach with a combination of formal and play based learning.

Over the decades, commercialization of education sector have resulted in increased competition, Although new approaches to school-based learning are very progressive, they have transformed primary education into a highly formal curriculum with no focus on informal learning. Informal learning includes life skills like communication, cooking and cleaning skills. Research supports the role of school-based learning of life skills. It is believed that it may help in improving discipline and self-reliance among children at an earlier age. For example, a school child who knows how to perform little household chores will be less dependent and will be more self-confident.

In addition, including play-based learning in primary school curriculum will allow children to learn through role plays and other unconventional techniques which have proven effectiveness in improving learning outcomes. This will also reduce the burden of formal learning, which is mostly involves lots of reading as well as writing. This shift in the learning environment will improve students engagement in school activities and will ultimately result in better learning outcomes.

Therefore, a balanced approach is the most suitable way to implement primary school curriculum. In my opinion, introducing play-based learning is crucial for better growth and development of students in early years such as primary education.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding the focus on formal learning and the importance of play-based learning. You maintain a clear position throughout, advocating for a balanced approach. The ideas are relevant and supported by logical reasoning, such as the link between life skills and self-reliance. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat brief. To reach a higher band, you could provide more specific examples or elaborate further on how play-based learning specifically improves academic outcomes beyond general statements. Overall, the response is well-focused and directly answers the question.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow. You use cohesive devices such as 'In addition,' 'Therefore,' and 'For example' to link your points. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the referencing could be more varied to improve the flow. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and the structure supports the overall argument effectively. To improve, focus on using a wider range of cohesive devices to connect sentences more fluidly rather than relying on standard starters.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with some precision, using terms like 'commercialization,' 'progressive,' and 'unconventional techniques.' There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'play base learning' (should be 'play-based') and 'mostly involves' (should be 'mostly involves' or 'mostly consists of'). While the vocabulary is adequate for the task, it lacks the sophistication and flexibility required for higher bands. To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic collocations and ensure consistent use of compound adjectives.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this level. There are some grammatical slips, such as 'a debate that whether' (should be 'a debate about whether') and 'education sector have resulted' (should be 'has resulted'). Additionally, there are minor punctuation and article errors throughout the text. Despite these, the meaning is always clear, and the errors do not impede communication. To achieve a higher score, aim for greater accuracy in subject-verb agreement and more consistent control over complex sentence structures.

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