Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Over the past few decades, a considerable number of primary schools are being more inclined towards less flexible and fixed structured syllabus. From my perspective I partially agree to the statement. In this essay I will support my opinion with critical thinking and logical reasons.

To begin with, a well structured and fixed curriculum could help the academic staff to fathom all the aspects of subject hence the staff would be able to convey the gist of the topic to students in the easiest way possible. It would also assist at the time of preparing the final question paper of exam as the whole content of subject is fixed and fully understood by the staff. Furthermore, fromal learning could help the students to stand out in competitive job market, as nowadays componies are more keen to recruit the professionals with the related skills instead of the one with certificate of extra curriculum activities.

On the other hand, such formal learning could restrict the individuals potential and capabilities of other interested fields. For instance, back in days when i was in primary school, we used to have 2-3 physical therapy lectures. Intially when we went out to the ground the teacher discovered that a considerbale number of students were really good at football. As time passed and due to academic pressure, the staff decided to reduce the physical therapy lecture and replaced with it mathematics and science. By the time we finished the final exam the energy and motivation of students towards football was already lost. To prevent this from happening the educational system should be more flexible and student friendly.

In conlucion, although formal learning method is helpfull to staff of school as well as assist the student to stand out in competition, the personal interest and motivation also shoud be considered. This could only be possible by establishing more flexible and student friendly educational system. As for me i partially agree to the statement.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. You maintain a clear position throughout, and your ideas are generally well-developed. For instance, the argument regarding the benefits of a fixed curriculum for teachers and the counter-argument about the loss of student motivation are relevant and supported by a personal example. However, the development could be more sophisticated; the link between primary school formal learning and 'competitive job markets' is a bit of a leap for that age group. To reach a higher band, ensure your arguments are more directly applicable to the primary school context.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with,' 'Furthermore,' and 'On the other hand' to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing and flow. For example, the phrase 'the one with certificate of extra curriculum activities' is slightly awkward and disrupts the cohesion of the sentence. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the benefits of formal learning to the drawbacks and the need for balance.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including terms like 'fathom,' 'curriculum,' and 'capabilities.' However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'fromal learning' (spelling), 'componies' (spelling), 'the one with certificate' (awkward phrasing), and 'physical therapy' (likely meant 'physical education'). While these errors do not impede communication, they indicate a need for more precise vocabulary control. To improve, focus on using collocations correctly and proofreading for common spelling errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'a considerable number of primary schools are being more inclined' (tense/aspect error), 'the staff decided to reduce the physical therapy lecture and replaced with it mathematics' (missing subject/word order), and 'As for me i partially agree' (capitalization and phrasing). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are missing commas in introductory clauses. The errors are noticeable but do not prevent the reader from understanding your main points.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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