Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is undeniable that learning is the significant part of the life. In this regard, some people believe that primary schools should focus to much on formal learning. In my view, i agree to large extent due to many reasons which will be outlined in the forthcoming paragraphs with logical conclusion.
To commence with, there are many reasons in the belief that primary schools should focus on formal learning. The first and foremost is it improves learning. To explain, formal learning teaches too much to students about good habits, skills and many life lessons which practical things sometimes fails to taught. For instance, in schools books taught the scholars about way of doing the scientific experiments, science knowledge, and help to build basic lessons like respecting teachers and elders. Secondly, it lead to personal growth. To elaborate, primary schools teaches students many things such as build ambitions in the life, focus on health, education to maintain higher intelligence. As focus improves the intelligence level and maintaining focus helps to achieve the ultimate goals in the life. Therefore, it lead to personal growth in a life although teamwork is also a way to grow. Furthermore, rules guide the person mind. To clarify, in the primary schools there are specific rules which helps to create discipline in children lives and by following those rules scholars can avoid mistakes from learning and guidance of the teachers. Moreover, in the schools teachers conduct tests which indicates the intelligence level and competition between individuals.
However, there are also few reasons that play is also necessary in children lives. The prime one is that it improves the health conditions. To justify, play is important in a life because it avoid the harmful diseases like headache, dengue and cold, it also have some other physical benefits such as build strength and coordination. Furthermore, it also help to learn basic skills like communication skill and built social skills, improves problem solving abilities and boost mental focus. As a result, all social, academic and cognitive skills are developed through play.
In conclusion, although there are many benefits of formal earning such as personal growth, improves learning and provide guidance. Yet, few other merits of play in children lives which cannot be neglected at any cost.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt, expressing a clear position on formal learning and discussing the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth. For instance, the arguments for formal learning focus heavily on 'intelligence' and 'discipline' without exploring the nuance of primary education. The discussion on play is also quite general, relying on broad claims about health and social skills. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific, concrete examples or logical explanations that connect your points more effectively to the primary school context.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion' to link your points. However, some of these transitions feel mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'As focus improves the intelligence level and maintaining focus helps to achieve the ultimate goals in the life.' The flow between sentences could be improved by using more varied linking words and ensuring that each sentence builds logically upon the previous one.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. You rely on basic terms like 'good habits', 'many things', and 'many reasons'. There are also some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'practical things sometimes fails to taught' and 'guide the person mind'. While the meaning is clear, the range is limited, and there is little evidence of less common lexical items or idiomatic language. To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensuring correct word forms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('books taught', 'schools teaches'), article usage ('in a life'), and awkward phrasing ('it lead to personal growth'). While you attempt complex structures, they are often marred by errors in tense or word order. To achieve a higher score, you need to demonstrate better control over basic grammar, particularly verb tenses and pluralization, and ensure that your complex sentences are constructed accurately.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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