Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
A number of people argue that primary schools are concentrating mainly on formal learning. I agree with this statement because primary schooling don't focus on student's holistic development. In my opinion, students develops a wide range of skill when they are involve in sports activities.
I agree to the fact that most schools education syllabus are academic focused. Students are bound to focus more on academics in order to obtain excellent grade in their examinations. Beyond this, some educational institutes lacks practical knowledge and learning is more focused on remembering than understanding. For example, students don't understand the purpose behind understanding the history of a nation, they grasp some dates and filled that in their answer and obtained good grades. Apart from this, sports gives students an opportunity to learn non-technical skills.
Sports plays an valuable role in student's life. As in sports students develops a skill that can't be obtained from books. While playing in a team, children learns about Team bonding, communication and Leaderships skills that are crucial for their holistic development. Also playing sports removes cultural difference and promote equality among students. Research shows that performing an physical activity regularly increase blood circulation and develop the muscles. It is observed that sports person are less prone to diseases. For example, my grandfather regularly do exercise and at the age 94, he is easily able to walk 5 km daily
In conclusion, in primary schools academics are important but for holistic developemnt there shouls be balance of both sports ans studi
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the focus on formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you provide examples, such as the mention of history and your grandfather, the explanation of why play is important in a primary school context could be more deeply explored. The conclusion is incomplete, which impacts the overall task completion. To reach a higher band, ensure that all arguments are fully extended and that the essay structure is brought to a complete, well-rounded finish.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'Apart from this' and 'In conclusion', to link your points. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly repetitive. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, and the abrupt ending of the final sentence disrupts the flow of the conclusion. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that connects back to the main thesis.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'holistic development', 'non-technical skills', and 'prone to diseases'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'filled that in their answer' instead of 'wrote them in their answers' and 'sports person' instead of 'athletes'. Spelling errors, such as 'developemnt' and 'shouls', also occur. To achieve a higher score, focus on refining your word choices and ensuring accurate spelling of key academic terms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly regarding subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'primary schooling don't focus', 'students develops', 'institutes lacks', 'children learns'). These errors are persistent throughout the text. While the meaning is generally clear, these frequent slips in basic grammar prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading your work specifically for subject-verb agreement and pluralization to improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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