Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is true that the primary school are focusing more on the traditional and also very formal learning system, which affect to the children and they end up being hating the study. As they always being in fear and so not able to focus. So there has to be some liberal in the teaching technique and adoptetion the fun teaching technique.

Though being in primary grade, student did not have that much maturity so for that to made them learn the subject and also make them aware about the importance of education. Using vary technique like learning the subject with interesting activities as it would help them to remember all time. Also changing the name of the character and made a story out of it in simple way make them understand the topics.

So learning with fun is important for the children even rather just relay on the study the children must encourage for different activities as per the caliber like swimming ,cricket, art work, quiz so from the young age they are confident and indulge some skill like oratical skill or art skill or being athletic. As example if the children had great power on language then it would good at giving speech and even participate in quiz. Even some children had good voice they can go for the singing also some are very good in mimic they can go for the drama and acting ,make career in theraters.

However the education is must for every child as it improve the knowledge and also being upgrade but its not the only thing which help to make career as there are different option which help them .So from that if they know from young age and learn the skill it would benefit in the future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention that children lack maturity and need fun techniques, the arguments remain repetitive and lack specific, well-supported examples. The position is clear, but the explanation of 'why' play is important could be more deeply explored with more sophisticated reasoning. To improve, ensure that each paragraph introduces a distinct, fully developed point rather than listing activities, which makes the argument feel like a collection of ideas rather than a cohesive discussion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, the transition 'So there has to be some liberal' is grammatically awkward and does not effectively link the ideas. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the phrase 'from that if they know from young age', where the antecedent is ambiguous. The progression of ideas within paragraphs is occasionally disjointed, making the flow feel somewhat forced. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words would significantly enhance the logical flow of your arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'great power on language' and 'good voice', which are imprecise. There are also several word-choice errors, such as 'adoptetion' (adoption), 'oratical' (oratorical), and 'theraters' (theatres). While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of collocation and the frequent spelling errors limit the score. To reach a higher band, focus on using more academic vocabulary and ensuring correct word forms in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('the primary school are focusing'), incorrect verb forms ('being hating', 'made them learn'), and sentence fragments or run-on sentences. There is a limited range of complex structures, and those attempted are often inaccurate. For instance, 'even rather just relay on the study the children must encourage' is structurally confused. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and the correct use of auxiliary verbs, before attempting more complex grammatical structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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